Why is there such an obsession with Foreskins in the OT
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05-03-2014, 08:21 AM
RE: Why is there such an obsession with Foreskins in the OT
(05-03-2014 06:52 AM)alpha male Wrote:  
(04-03-2014 09:11 PM)freetoreason Wrote:  'David arose and went, along with his men, and killed two hundred of the Philistines. And David brought their foreskins, which were given in full number to the king, that he might become the king’s son-in-law. And Saul gave him his daughter Michal for a wife.'

Obsessed.
As someone already pointed out, this was an easy way to prove number of kills - a lot easier than bringing back the full body, or head, etc.

Plus, RobbyPants said that obsession was hyperbole, and really just meant concerned. Yet, others are still arguing obsession. Which is it? Consider

Why not bring back the right ear? Scalps? The right thumb? Tongues? The whole dick? Nah, lets just grab the foreskin. I wonder who the lucky guy was that got to carry the bag all the way back. I'm pretty sure they kept him downwind.

For the record, I'm in the hyperbole club. It sounds like that's very important to you, so there you go. We now have two people in the hyperbole club. Anyone else? Please. Stop focusing on the foreskins and lets talk about semantics. Just ignore the big pile of foreskins. Lets talk about words. What do they mean? STOP TALKING ABOUT THE FORESKINS! EYES OVER HERE! LOOK, I HAVE A BALLOON AND A KITTEN! NO FORESKINS HERE!

If Jesus died for our sins, why is there still sin? If man was created from dust, why is there still dust? If Americans came from Europe, why are there still Europeans?
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05-03-2014, 08:25 AM
RE: Why is there such an obsession with Foreskins in the OT
(05-03-2014 08:21 AM)guitar_nut Wrote:  Why not bring back the right ear? Scalps? The right thumb? Tongues? The whole dick? Nah, lets just grab the foreskin.
As already noted, lighter and easier to carry.
Quote:For the record, I'm in the hyperbole club. It sounds like that's very important to you, so there you go. We now have two people in the hyperbole club. Anyone else? Please. Stop focusing on the foreskins and lets talk about semantics. Just ignore the big pile of foreskins. Lets talk about words. What do they mean? STOP TALKING ABOUT THE FORESKINS! EYES OVER HERE! LOOK, I HAVE A BALLOON AND A KITTEN! NO FORESKINS HERE!
Except...I'm discussing both. Amazing how you people have this need to pretend that I'm not addressing the main issue.
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05-03-2014, 08:29 AM
RE: Why is there such an obsession with Foreskins in the OT
(05-03-2014 08:25 AM)alpha male Wrote:  
(05-03-2014 08:21 AM)guitar_nut Wrote:  Why not bring back the right ear? Scalps? The right thumb? Tongues? The whole dick? Nah, lets just grab the foreskin.
As already noted, lighter and easier to carry.
Quote:For the record, I'm in the hyperbole club. It sounds like that's very important to you, so there you go. We now have two people in the hyperbole club. Anyone else? Please. Stop focusing on the foreskins and lets talk about semantics. Just ignore the big pile of foreskins. Lets talk about words. What do they mean? STOP TALKING ABOUT THE FORESKINS! EYES OVER HERE! LOOK, I HAVE A BALLOON AND A KITTEN! NO FORESKINS HERE!
Except...I'm discussing both. Amazing how you people have this need to pretend that I'm not addressing the main issue.

Awww
That's right. We are ALL liars. Only YOU are the one with truth.Hobo


Funny how that works.
LMAO

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05-03-2014, 08:56 AM
RE: Why is there such an obsession with Foreskins in the OT
(05-03-2014 08:25 AM)alpha male Wrote:  
(05-03-2014 08:21 AM)guitar_nut Wrote:  Why not bring back the right ear? Scalps? The right thumb? Tongues? The whole dick? Nah, lets just grab the foreskin.
As already noted, lighter and easier to carry.
Quote:For the record, I'm in the hyperbole club. It sounds like that's very important to you, so there you go. We now have two people in the hyperbole club. Anyone else? Please. Stop focusing on the foreskins and lets talk about semantics. Just ignore the big pile of foreskins. Lets talk about words. What do they mean? STOP TALKING ABOUT THE FORESKINS! EYES OVER HERE! LOOK, I HAVE A BALLOON AND A KITTEN! NO FORESKINS HERE!
Except...I'm discussing both. Amazing how you people have this need to pretend that I'm not addressing the main issue.

Your trying. Lighter and easier to carry? Riiiiiiiight. What's amazing is you coming to an atheist website and trying to make sense of foreskin collection.

How much does a foreskin weigh compared to a human ear? And since you're talking about ease, let's talk about how easy an ear is to remove vs. removing the foreskin, and only the foreskin. Then let's talk about having to separate the foreskins (which have no doubt become stuck together during the trip home) before counting them all, versus dumping out a bag of ears. Your reasons for picking foreskins over any other body part are hilarious. A wise man would have probably answered "I have no real idea why they chose the foreskins."

If Jesus died for our sins, why is there still sin? If man was created from dust, why is there still dust? If Americans came from Europe, why are there still Europeans?
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05-03-2014, 08:57 AM
RE: Why is there such an obsession with Foreskins in the OT
(04-03-2014 11:27 AM)alpha male Wrote:  As I noted in another thread recently, a stated purpose of the law was to set Israel apart from other nations. Circumcision would discourage frivolous converts, don'tcha think?

This a new defence to me. God is setting the initiation rite to the club really high. However, I have a few questions:

1. Why is the bar for entry to the Christianity club so low, that lots and lots of "frivolous" converts are allowed in? (These would be the heretics and ex-Christians from Alpha's point of view.) Why didn't God insist on circumcision for Christianity to keep the riff-raff out?

2. What are the women supposed to sacrifice? What equivalent part of their anatomy is so easily disposable and why didn't God ask for it? Maybe they're not welcome in the club?

3. If entry to the club occurs on the 8th day after birth, what choice did the infants have in the matter? And if they changed their minds after about paying club dues, how could they get their "initiation fee" back?

Doc
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05-03-2014, 09:00 AM
RE: Why is there such an obsession with Foreskins in the OT
AlphaDog

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05-03-2014, 09:52 AM
RE: Why is there such an obsession with Foreskins in the OT
(05-03-2014 08:56 AM)guitar_nut Wrote:  Your trying. Lighter and easier to carry? Riiiiiiiight. What's amazing is you coming to an atheist website and trying to make sense of foreskin collection.

How much does a foreskin weigh compared to a human ear? And since you're talking about ease, let's talk about how easy an ear is to remove vs. removing the foreskin, and only the foreskin. Then let's talk about having to separate the foreskins (which have no doubt become stuck together during the trip home) before counting them all, versus dumping out a bag of ears. Your reasons for picking foreskins over any other body part are hilarious. A wise man would have probably answered "I have no real idea why they chose the foreskins."
Actually this point was first made by KC here:
http://www.thethinkingatheist.com/forum/...#pid508735
It didn't seem controversial at the time, but you can still take it up with him. I guess he's not a "wise man."
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05-03-2014, 09:58 AM
RE: Why is there such an obsession with Foreskins in the OT
There is a hill in Israel call foreskin hill...that's disgusting...

Joshua 5:3
And Joshua made him sharp knives, and circumcised the children of Israel at the hill of the foreskins.

...
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05-03-2014, 10:08 AM (This post was last modified: 05-03-2014 10:16 AM by Raptor Jesus.)
RE: Why is there such an obsession with Foreskins in the OT
(05-03-2014 08:57 AM)docskeptic Wrote:  ...
2. What are the women supposed to sacrifice? What equivalent part of their anatomy is so easily disposable and why didn't God ask for it? Maybe they're not welcome in the club?
...

Their labia majoras. They just forgot to mention it in the bible.

There was a scene in which King David asked for 400 labias, (200x2, if you're following the math) and some chick gave them to him, and he was pleased and "God" rewarded her with riches.

But then they just forgot to write about it in the bible...but it's the labia majoras.

"God" loves foreskins and labias. He plays with them like dolls, dresses them in clothes, makes little foreskin and labia houses for them to live in, and makes them "kiss" each other, because he's "God" and he's bored (because he's already seen and knows everything) and needs something to occupy his time, so he choose to fill his life with labias and foreskins, and we are merely the vehicle by which he aquires them...

...
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05-03-2014, 10:19 AM
RE: Why is there such an obsession with Foreskins in the OT
(05-03-2014 09:58 AM)Raptor Jesus Wrote:  There is a hill in Israel call foreskin hill...that's disgusting...

Joshua 5:3
And Joshua made him sharp knives, and circumcised the children of Israel at the hill of the foreskins.

We have Virginville, Intercourse and BlueBall (all towns) here in PA.
Israel's got nuttin we cant make look stupid here in PA.

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