Wife is leaving me because of my nonbelief
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01-05-2013, 02:22 PM
RE: Wife is leaving me because of my nonbelief
(01-05-2013 09:28 AM)Weeeeee_Zard Wrote:  Man, if there was true love this wouldn't be happening. She is not to rely on if this is true.

I don't know if I agree with that assessment. I'm always uncomfortable evaluating the "truth" of a person's feeling. I recently left a long-term loving relationship. It was very difficult because I still care for this person, but I know it would be unhealthy to stay because we'll only feed each other's depression. I think it's entirely possible to love a person who isn't good for you.

How long have you been married?
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01-05-2013, 08:11 PM
RE: Wife is leaving me because of my nonbelief
(01-05-2013 02:22 PM)cbb2274 Wrote:  
(01-05-2013 09:28 AM)Weeeeee_Zard Wrote:  Man, if there was true love this wouldn't be happening. She is not to rely on if this is true.

I don't know if I agree with that assessment. I'm always uncomfortable evaluating the "truth" of a person's feeling. I recently left a long-term loving relationship. It was very difficult because I still care for this person, but I know it would be unhealthy to stay because we'll only feed each other's depression. I think it's entirely possible to love a person who isn't good for you.

How long have you been married?

We got married in January of 2012, we have known each other since 2006 or so. I agree with you in that you can love someone who ultimately is not good for you.
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01-05-2013, 08:15 PM
RE: Wife is leaving me because of my nonbelief
(01-05-2013 07:56 AM)Hafnof Wrote:  But let me get this straight, right? You drop this bombshell just a couple of weeks ago. While she's reeling about the fact you're going to hell and you are everything her mother warned her about and all of the children she imagined having with you will probably be corrupted and consigned to hell too... While she's coming to terms with the idea you are under the influence of Satan... That's the point where you tell her you're starting your own atheist club and aren't just under Satan's influence but one of his fang generals intent on dragging her to hell also... This is the point she freaks out and gives you the ever so convincing argument of "come back to Christianity if you love me"... Is this an accurate characterization of what has happened here?

She has known that I am an atheist for awhile she just did not fully accept it until a couple weeks ago. I have a library of atheist theme books from Dawkins, Harris, Hitchens and Shermer. Other than that, yes that is pretty accurate.
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01-05-2013, 08:16 PM
RE: Wife is leaving me because of my nonbelief
(01-05-2013 07:56 AM)Hafnof Wrote:  But let me get this straight, right? You drop this bombshell just a couple of weeks ago. While she's reeling about the fact you're going to hell and you are everything her mother warned her about and all of the children she imagined having with you will probably be corrupted and consigned to hell too... While she's coming to terms with the idea you are under the influence of Satan... That's the point where you tell her you're starting your own atheist club and aren't just under Satan's influence but one of his fang generals intent on dragging her to hell also... This is the point she freaks out and gives you the ever so convincing argument of "come back to Christianity if you love me"... Is this an accurate characterization of what has happened here?

She has known that I am an atheist for awhile she just did not fully accept it until a couple weeks ago. I have a library of atheist theme books from Dawkins, Harris, Hitchens and Shermer so I mean it is pretty obvious. Other than that, yes that is pretty accurate.
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02-05-2013, 12:48 PM
RE: Wife is leaving me because of my nonbelief
Did it seem like a difficult decision for her?
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02-05-2013, 01:07 PM
 
RE: Wife is leaving me because of my nonbelief
Hey RS,

Love may be blind, but marriage is always conditional it seems. You both have known each other for a while. I'm wondering something, and I'm not insinuating anything or casting any blame anywhere, but you have known her religious beliefs for some time, could branching out as an atheist be your way of breaking up? I mean, if you present your spouse with a deal-breaker isn't that kind of like breaking the deal?

But it's going to be alright. One way or another, it's going to work out. After all, ultimately, you have to go the direction your being led, and that's more important than any other life concerns, in my opinion.
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02-05-2013, 01:27 PM
RE: Wife is leaving me because of my nonbelief
(02-05-2013 12:48 PM)cbb2274 Wrote:  Did it seem like a difficult decision for her?

No, because she loves her imaginary friends more than she loves her husband.
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02-05-2013, 01:33 PM (This post was last modified: 02-05-2013 01:39 PM by cbb2274.)
RE: Wife is leaving me because of my nonbelief
(02-05-2013 01:07 PM)Egor Wrote:  Hey RS,

Love may be blind, but marriage is always conditional it seems. You both have known each other for a while. I'm wondering something, and I'm not insinuating anything or casting any blame anywhere, but you have known her religious beliefs for some time, could branching out as an atheist be your way of breaking up? I mean, if you present your spouse with a deal-breaker isn't that kind of like breaking the deal?

...or would you be (or have you been) willing to overlook your differences? It sounds like you have both tolerated your differences for a while now. Is the rift between you more her problem or your problem? I'm in a minority here in rural North Carolina, so I often find myself carefully picking my battles. I don't know how I would deal with a relationship with a very religious person, but I know that I have broad criteria for selecting a mate.
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02-05-2013, 01:41 PM
RE: Wife is leaving me because of my nonbelief
(02-05-2013 01:07 PM)Egor Wrote:  Hey RS,

Love may be blind, but marriage is always conditional it seems. You both have known each other for a while. I'm wondering something, and I'm not insinuating anything or casting any blame anywhere, but you have known her religious beliefs for some time, could branching out as an atheist be your way of breaking up? I mean, if you present your spouse with a deal-breaker isn't that kind of like breaking the deal?

But it's going to be alright. One way or another, it's going to work out. After all, ultimately, you have to go the direction your being led, and that's more important than any other life concerns, in my opinion.

I have been an atheist basically all my life. I have been reading "atheistic" material for a few years now. (before we even got married). I guess not believing in God was OK but being an atheist is not. I tried explaining it to her that the not believing in god (that being denying his exitance) is the difinition of an atheist.

What is being fed to these theists is sickening. You say the word atheist and it can send shivers done someones spine, more so than saying that one is gay. For this we have the Bible and the churches to blame. I think its time that all this shit comes to an end. I just wish I were still going to be around when it finally does.
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02-05-2013, 03:24 PM
RE: Wife is leaving me because of my nonbelief
Seems your wife is displaying the typical Christian love.

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