Wife wants me to have an open relationship
Post Reply
 
Thread Rating:
  • 0 Votes - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
14-01-2014, 05:43 AM
RE: Wife wants me to have an open relationship
(13-01-2014 09:20 PM)djkamilo Wrote:  I don't want to be married. I never did. I got married for religious reasons which are of no meaning to me anymore. I do have to live with the fact that I have a wife and little kids and the last thing I would want would be to harm them. A divorce seems inevitable but at least now we're being amicable.

From this comment alone I say get a divorce, and soon. You say now you're being amicable, but I can almost guarantee it won't last long. Especially if either you or her act on this "pass". At some point your kids are going to take notice of this situation as well and will wonder what is going on. Do you want to try to explain what is happening in your relationship that includes other people in a way they can comprehend (I'm not aware of a way to do that properly), or would you rather explain to them at some point that you and their mother just didn't work out and went your separate ways? The latter seems much easier to me, and less damaging.

Your responsibilities to your children will not change if you separate. You have a responsibility to yourself to be happy, and to set an example to your children on how to be happy as well. I will not say that it is impossible to have a healthy family inside of an open relationship, because it isn't, but it is very very difficult and almost impossible to maintain without problems.

You already know what is best. You just need to figure out how and when to make it happen.

"Good news, everyone!"
-Cody
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
14-01-2014, 06:29 AM
RE: Wife wants me to have an open relationship
What ticks me off about religion is how judgmental it is. People can grow apart and stay in a contract still. Famous bands stay together to make money but the members may not get along.

I'd say if you both know it isn't working then even if you are still married be mature about it. The only risk in have sex outside that contract is judgment of others. But I've also seen bitterness turn divorce into very messy wars. The safe thing to do is wait until the courts give you that paper making it official.

Only you know your wife better than we do and no one can really advise you.

I can only say I got lucky with my wife when she told me she wanted a divorce. She could have made my life miserable, but we simply parted ways. She was even compassionate enough to wait until I had a stable job and helped me move into a new apartment AFTER our separation.

Poetry by Brian37(poems by an atheist) Also on Facebook as BrianJames Rational Poet and Twitter Brianrrs37
Visit this user's website Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Brian37's post
14-01-2014, 07:36 AM
RE: Wife wants me to have an open relationship
(14-01-2014 02:37 AM)Kestrel Wrote:  
(13-01-2014 05:51 PM)WitchSabrina Wrote:  How bout this? ZZZZzzzz....
How 'bout this;

Scroll back up and note that I had self edited the post a full three minutes before your response.
I did this because I noted that my initial response was considered, "insensitive", or whatever.

So be clear that it was you who replied and posted that, which I had edited.

So at best you can claim ignorance, (heh), that you didn't notice my edit.
At worst, that you did notice it but posted it anyway.

(psst! Plead ignorance. Because anything else will be admitting to the same classless charge, you claim against me.)

Since there is no way to dredge up "sympathy" for what is consequence, I'll bow out of this thread.



I have just read your response.
and I think it was awesome of you to edit by the way.


cheers

When I want your opinion I'll read your entrails.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes WitchSabrina's post
14-01-2014, 07:48 AM
RE: Wife wants me to have an open relationship
I really hope that you two can figure out a plan like a few others have mentioned that puts the needs and wants of the kids first. Your children have no say whatsoever in the dissolution of their family. NONE, but they will bear the brunt of the burden of you and your wife's bedroom decisions.

do your children a favor and try marriage counseling rather than the willy-nilly talking on the internet with people rather than facing your issues and both of you putting some work into making it work.


"Life is a daring adventure or it is nothing"--Helen Keller
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 2 users Like Bows and Arrows's post
14-01-2014, 08:12 AM
RE: Wife wants me to have an open relationship
(14-01-2014 07:36 AM)WitchSabrina Wrote:  cheers

It's yesterday's news.
Cheers. Thumbsup

"If you're going my way, I'll go with you."- Jim Croce
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Kestrel's post
20-01-2014, 06:56 AM
RE: Wife wants me to have an open relationship
Get it in writing first. If she gives you a free pass, get it in writing - couldn't hurt to get it notarized. Not kidding.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
13-02-2014, 03:51 PM
RE: Wife wants me to have an open relationship
hi this is the wife and aside from extremely insulted and hurt by 9 pages full of people that dont know jack shit about my or my "husband"'s life i dont know where to start 1st he kept going on and on about how he wanted to sleep with other women for months 2nd i just reconnected with and old friend that ive know for 12 years (im 25) 3rd ive always been honest with my husband i have never said that i wanted to sleep with anyone else not even in a 3sum i just want to be in a relationship where i am loved and cared for not ignored i cant even being to count the times i have woken up to my "husband" watching porn and masturbating right next to me while he refused to have sex with me i proposed and open relationship for him not for me if i could have it my way it would just be the 2 of us and no one else i dont need porn or toys to be satisfied i need a man who want to be with me and with me alone so constantly hearing 'i want to sleep with other women' 'ive missed out' 'i want a 3sum' 'i feel trapped' its gets to you and you have to let go which is what i did to all you fuckers that said i wanted a cuckold go fuck yourselfs up the ass with a bat i love my husband even when he is an idiot and i would never humiliate him like he has humiliated me I DO NOT WANT ANYONE oh... did he mention that i dont even want to have sex, of that hes on vine posting videos of himself cummin to other women or on dating site...oh of course he didnt why would he the whole point of this thread is to make me look bad for giving him the freedom that he wanted in conclusion FUCK YOU all you dont know me so before you judge me ask questions and get your facts straight

“The reason people use a crucifix against vampires is because vampires are allergic to bullshit.” ― Richard Pryor
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
13-02-2014, 03:56 PM
RE: Wife wants me to have an open relationship
(13-02-2014 03:51 PM)djkamilo Wrote:  hi this is the wife and aside from extremely insulted and hurt by 9 pages full of people that dont know jack shit about my or my "husband"'s life i dont know where to start 1st he kept going on and on about how he wanted to sleep with other women for months 2nd i just reconnected with and old friend that ive know for 12 years (im 25) 3rd ive always been honest with my husband i have never said that i wanted to sleep with anyone else not even in a 3sum i just want to be in a relationship where i am loved and cared for not ignored i cant even being to count the times i have woken up to my "husband" watching porn and masturbating right next to me while he refused to have sex with me i proposed and open relationship for him not for me if i could have it my way it would just be the 2 of us and no one else i dont need porn or toys to be satisfied i need a man who want to be with me and with me alone so constantly hearing 'i want to sleep with other women' 'ive missed out' 'i want a 3sum' 'i feel trapped' its gets to you and you have to let go which is what i did to all you fuckers that said i wanted a cuckold go fuck yourselfs up the ass with a bat i love my husband even when he is an idiot and i would never humiliate him like he has humiliated me I DO NOT WANT ANYONE oh... did he mention that i dont even want to have sex, of that hes on vine posting videos of himself cummin to other women or on dating site...oh of course he didnt why would he the whole point of this thread is to make me look bad for giving him the freedom that he wanted in conclusion FUCK YOU all you dont know me so before you judge me ask questions and get your facts straight

Well shit, that escalated quickly.
You can't really blame these guys (I don't believe I've posted here before - I could be wrong) for what they don't know.
This is the Help and Support thread, we just go off what we know. Though, I am sorry to hear of your side (truly).

Atir aissom atir imon
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
13-02-2014, 04:02 PM
RE: Wife wants me to have an open relationship
[Image: 12508614174_d5d4544729.jpg]


"Life is a daring adventure or it is nothing"--Helen Keller
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Bows and Arrows's post
13-02-2014, 04:04 PM
RE: Wife wants me to have an open relationship
(14-01-2014 07:48 AM)Bows and Arrows Wrote:  I really hope that you two can figure out a plan like a few others have mentioned that puts the needs and wants of the kids first. Your children have no say whatsoever in the dissolution of their family. NONE, but they will bear the brunt of the burden of you and your wife's bedroom decisions.

do your children a favor and try marriage counseling rather than the willy-nilly talking on the internet with people rather than facing your issues and both of you putting some work into making it work.

Yep....I stand by my earlier words.


"Life is a daring adventure or it is nothing"--Helen Keller
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
Post Reply
Forum Jump: