Woe is me: the following will be an episode of delirious whining. Feel free to ignore
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09-03-2014, 04:44 AM
RE: Woe is me: the following will be an episode of delirious whining. Feel free to ignore
Single mothers deserve all the help in the world. I've raised just two children as a couple with my spouse, and those early days were hard hard hard. Anyone who can do that by themselves with no live in help is a hero. Good luck and you're doing great.

Some rules of parenting I follow:
* Don't worry about the house being a mess. Don't place unnecessary expectations on yourself. If you have the time, energy and desire then so be it. If you don't have the time, don't have the energy, or don't have the desire... let it go.
* Don't let visitors be a burden. Don't go out of your way to cater for guests. Let them help you with the dishes, with laundry, etc. If they don't offer, ask. If they aren't interested in helping then fuckem Wink Asking them to look after the kids while you sleep is also Good Parenting™.
* Share the burden. If you know other parents, let their kids spend some time at your place and let your kids spend time at theirs. More kids aren't much more work to look after than a few kids because they help keep each other entertained, and the time off helps.

Give me your argument in the form of a published paper, and then we can start to talk.
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09-03-2014, 05:49 AM
RE: Woe is me: the following will be an episode of delirious whining. Feel free to ignore
I feel for you. It's no fun being stuck in the house and trying to get your life back.
I wouldn't worry too much about a tidy house.
I don't know any normal person who has a spotless house when they have 3 kids to look after, even if they have a partner. Be kinder to yourself in that respect.
Asking about their Daddy is normal too. Other kids have one, where's mine?
I used to tell my son that his Daddy had gone away because he wasn't very good at being a Daddy. I never said anything bad about him (god knows I could have) and, in the end, he stopped asking.
I hope you are able to get some sleep, you'll feel so much better then.
You've had a horrible time but you're safe now.
Rose
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09-03-2014, 07:28 AM
RE: Woe is me: the following will be an episode of delirious whining. Feel free to ignore
Aww, I wish I could be there and help you with anything sweetie! Hug

It‘s amazing how you manage to do this, you should feel proud of yourself. Just because the house is a mess, it doesn‘t mean that you‘re not a great, hard-working mum! Actually, screw the house, it doesn‘t matter!

Hang in there, things will get better!

"Behind every great pirate, there is a great butt."
-Guybrush Threepwood-
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09-03-2014, 07:34 AM
RE: Woe is me: the following will be an episode of delirious whining. Feel free to ignore
Hug Hug
i'm sorry you have so much work today...
how old is your oldest?
My mom made me clean up my own mess since i was 7 and i learned to make less mess

Hug hope everything turns out ok

I don't really like going outside.
It's too damn "peopley" out there....
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09-03-2014, 07:57 AM
RE: Woe is me: the following will be an episode of delirious whining. Feel free to ignore
Leaving you a big Hug

If I lived closer I'd help with those monkeys so you could catch 40 winks.

Heart

When I want your opinion I'll read your entrails.
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09-03-2014, 09:33 AM
RE: Woe is me: the following will be an episode of delirious whining. Feel free to ignore
(09-03-2014 07:34 AM)Lightvader Wrote:  Hug Hug
i'm sorry you have so much work today...
how old is your oldest?
My mom made me clean up my own mess since i was 7 and i learned to make less mess

Hug hope everything turns out ok

My oldest is 5 and second is 4. The both love to help, but they're just not good at it lol!

Thanks everyone!
The sun is shining and it's 28 degrees but tomorrow it's supposed to be 57. Perhaps a trip to the park will cheer me up.

Swing with me a while, we can listen to the birds call, we can keep each other warm.
Swing with me forever, we can count up every flower, we can weather every storm.
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09-03-2014, 09:59 AM
RE: Woe is me: the following will be an episode of delirious whining. Feel free to ignore
(09-03-2014 04:37 AM)Free Thought Wrote:  
(09-03-2014 04:36 AM)DLJ Wrote:  My kids became dramatically more manageable once we removed casein (dairy), gluten (wheat), additives, preservatives and especially colourants.

I hear sedatives are pretty good to!

For her or the kids. Tongue



Put down the pitchforks...it's a joke.

I'm not anti-social. I'm pro-solitude. Sleepy
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09-03-2014, 10:04 AM
RE: Woe is me: the following will be an episode of delirious whining. Feel free to ignore
Single-parenting is rough. It does seem you never get a break. Can you get someone to watch them even for a couple hours so you can take a nap or go to a movie?

The other thing I would suggest is to get them involved in helping you clean up. Even the littlest ones can learn to pick up and put toys away. Make a game of sorting laundry...teach them colors that way while you sort things out. Young kids can fold towels and washcloths. Some kids like to help with dishes. Maybe bribe them with something like "hey, let's clean up and then watch a movie", then maybe you can at least sit down for an hour or so.

Make a strict bed time and stick to it. Just knowing you have an hour or two after they go to bed is something to look forward to, read a book, take a nice hot soak in the tub, do your nails.

I'm not anti-social. I'm pro-solitude. Sleepy
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09-03-2014, 10:15 AM
RE: Woe is me: the following will be an episode of delirious whining. Feel free to ignore
My plan is always find a way to tire the fuckers out. Lol. The malls near here have play places for them to be wild monkeys. Pre school was a lifesaver, even sent mine to the local church one because at age 4 they aren't doing much except sticking glitter to their neighbors hair.

Mommy groups also helped because at least I got to meet with other people at the park and talk to others who spoke in full sentences. They also understood when you just wanted to go to the grocery store all by yourself for an hour. We would trade.

Single moms are tough, like Haf said, it's hard with a partner, don't think I would be as successful if I had to do this on my own.


"Life is a daring adventure or it is nothing"--Helen Keller
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09-03-2014, 10:16 AM
RE: Woe is me: the following will be an episode of delirious whining. Feel free to ignore
What angie said

I don't really like going outside.
It's too damn "peopley" out there....
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