Worst way to find out
Post Reply
 
Thread Rating:
  • 0 Votes - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
25-08-2015, 10:38 AM
RE: Worst way to find out
(25-08-2015 10:18 AM)goodwithoutgod Wrote:  Both of my parents are religious nuts. My father was a southern baptist minister. They divorced later and remarried. Now my mother is a Pentecostal minister who is in Africa right now on a revival tour Rolleyes My father and his wife are Mormons now.

We don't talk often, and when we do go visit on a rare occasion for a few hours church inevitably slips into everything they say because it is their entire life. I just smile and nod politely and change the subject. They know I am "not religious" but do not know the extent to which I work against religion. We just avoid the subject of possible. Don't have much for advice, and wish you the best during this.

Makes me feel lucky the bitch only tried to kill me. I'd rather fight off a nutcase trying to strangle me than put up with that bullshit year after year.

At least she wasn't religious.

NOTE: Member, Tomasia uses this site to slander other individuals. He then later proclaims it a joke, but not in public.
I will call him a liar and a dog here and now.
Banjo.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Banjo's post
25-08-2015, 10:40 AM
RE: Worst way to find out
Don't worry, dude. Banjo's going through treatment for cancer and his meds make him a little loopy sometimes. He's actually really nice, and we love him. Smile

"Theology made no provision for evolution. The biblical authors had missed the most important revelation of all! Could it be that they were not really privy to the thoughts of God?" - E. O. Wilson
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 2 users Like RocketSurgeon76's post
25-08-2015, 10:49 AM
RE: Worst way to find out
(25-08-2015 10:16 AM)Banjo Wrote:  Yeah that sucks mate. But you are who you are and if they can't handle it, it's their problem not yours.

You're a rational intelligent man. That's what matters most.

My mother tried to kill me once. I was such a prick (Aussie smart arse kid) that she jumped on me and tried to strangle me. I got the fuck out and went back to the bush. I was about 11 or 12 or so. Don't really remember. Moved from Melbourne to the middle of nowhere in Australia and hunted I think. Pigs and roos. Or maybe I worked on a boat??? Time is all messed up in my mind.

Anyway I am rambling because of the med's. It just could be worse. You know?

Anyway, in my Aussie vernacular I am gonna say "Fuck them!".

I am gonna give you a rep point for being 30. And an atheist freethinker in a world of religious madness!

Thanks. I definitely agree that if they can't handle who I am it's their problem. I essentially said as much to them.

Holy shit, are you the original Crocodile Dundee? That sounds like a crazy childhood. I just got the hell away from my home the boring way, bought a one way plane ticket.

I think I'm going to use your "Fuck them!" in my bad Aussie impression as a mantra as I deal with their shit Smile My thing is I go back and forth between that fuck em attitude and the "oh but it's my parents", so I end up somewhere in the middle and it gets weird.

I'm too new to know what the hell a rep point is but I assume it's good, so thank you.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 2 users Like gnarlynewt's post
25-08-2015, 10:53 AM
RE: Worst way to find out
(25-08-2015 10:49 AM)gnarlynewt Wrote:  
(25-08-2015 10:16 AM)Banjo Wrote:  Yeah that sucks mate. But you are who you are and if they can't handle it, it's their problem not yours.

You're a rational intelligent man. That's what matters most.

My mother tried to kill me once. I was such a prick (Aussie smart arse kid) that she jumped on me and tried to strangle me. I got the fuck out and went back to the bush. I was about 11 or 12 or so. Don't really remember. Moved from Melbourne to the middle of nowhere in Australia and hunted I think. Pigs and roos. Or maybe I worked on a boat??? Time is all messed up in my mind.

Anyway I am rambling because of the med's. It just could be worse. You know?

Anyway, in my Aussie vernacular I am gonna say "Fuck them!".

I am gonna give you a rep point for being 30. And an atheist freethinker in a world of religious madness!

Thanks. I definitely agree that if they can't handle who I am it's their problem. I essentially said as much to them.

Holy shit, are you the original Crocodile Dundee? That sounds like a crazy childhood. I just got the hell away from my home the boring way, bought a one way plane ticket.

I think I'm going to use your "Fuck them!" in my bad Aussie impression as a mantra as I deal with their shit Smile My thing is I go back and forth between that fuck em attitude and the "oh but it's my parents", so I end up somewhere in the middle and it gets weird.

I'm too new to know what the hell a rep point is but I assume it's good, so thank you.

It's that #1 in the top right of your page mate.

Yeah one day I'll tell you about the great white shark at Forster Tuncurry that must've been twenty feet long when I was surfing around 13?? Fucked if I know. I got the fuck out of there. Bloody thing was right in front of me!

Surf was huge too. What a waste!

NOTE: Member, Tomasia uses this site to slander other individuals. He then later proclaims it a joke, but not in public.
I will call him a liar and a dog here and now.
Banjo.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
25-08-2015, 10:56 AM
RE: Worst way to find out
(25-08-2015 10:40 AM)RocketSurgeon76 Wrote:  Don't worry, dude. Banjo's going through treatment for cancer and his meds make him a little loopy sometimes. He's actually really nice, and we love him. Smile


Yeah I'm off my tree. I've even had morphine. Still can't sleep.

I've been trying to watch an old Tom Hanks movie but it keeps buffering. Sad

NOTE: Member, Tomasia uses this site to slander other individuals. He then later proclaims it a joke, but not in public.
I will call him a liar and a dog here and now.
Banjo.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Banjo's post
25-08-2015, 11:13 AM
RE: Worst way to find out
(25-08-2015 10:31 AM)Mr. Boston Wrote:  It can be a frustrating experience but at least the band-aid's been ripped off. In the long run that might end up being for the best. My mom's a retired Methodist minister and when she found out concretely that I was an atheist (I think she had suspected for years but never really asked) she was depressed for a little while but she eventually came around. It's been somehow harder on her that we're not baptizing our kids and raising them Christian; they also have Jewish heritage and we're not raising them in a synagogue either - but we intend to expose them to the core tenets of numerous religions and spiritual philosophies.

Anyway your parents probably feel pretty "lost" over all this, like they failed as parents somehow. I know my mom felt genuinely sad for me that I couldn't get the same comfort in the concept of a creator/overseer that she gets. I think after enough time went by that she eventually realized my rejection of unfounded claims of a supernatural realm actually point to her success as a parent. She taught me to be curious, to not be satisfied with incomplete or illogical answers, and to make up my own mind. Your parents may come around to that viewpoint too, that your skepticism means they raised you to be a seeker rather than a follower.

Part of me is a little relieved everything is out now. And they even saw other comments about things not related to religion, so it's all hanging out there now. My mom being depressed is the worst thing about it though, I'd prefer is she was angry so we could go at it, instead of feeling like I'm walking through a minefield trying to talk about this shit. I said something to the effect of how their raising me right to think critically and question things is a good thing even if they don't like where it got me, but I think they're still to much in panic mode for that to have any real meaning. Definitely needs some time before things settle.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 2 users Like gnarlynewt's post
25-08-2015, 11:19 AM
RE: Worst way to find out
(25-08-2015 11:13 AM)gnarlynewt Wrote:  
(25-08-2015 10:31 AM)Mr. Boston Wrote:  It can be a frustrating experience but at least the band-aid's been ripped off. In the long run that might end up being for the best. My mom's a retired Methodist minister and when she found out concretely that I was an atheist (I think she had suspected for years but never really asked) she was depressed for a little while but she eventually came around. It's been somehow harder on her that we're not baptizing our kids and raising them Christian; they also have Jewish heritage and we're not raising them in a synagogue either - but we intend to expose them to the core tenets of numerous religions and spiritual philosophies.

Anyway your parents probably feel pretty "lost" over all this, like they failed as parents somehow. I know my mom felt genuinely sad for me that I couldn't get the same comfort in the concept of a creator/overseer that she gets. I think after enough time went by that she eventually realized my rejection of unfounded claims of a supernatural realm actually point to her success as a parent. She taught me to be curious, to not be satisfied with incomplete or illogical answers, and to make up my own mind. Your parents may come around to that viewpoint too, that your skepticism means they raised you to be a seeker rather than a follower.

Part of me is a little relieved everything is out now. And they even saw other comments about things not related to religion, so it's all hanging out there now. My mom being depressed is the worst thing about it though, I'd prefer is she was angry so we could go at it, instead of feeling like I'm walking through a minefield trying to talk about this shit. I said something to the effect of how their raising me right to think critically and question things is a good thing even if they don't like where it got me, but I think they're still to much in panic mode for that to have any real meaning. Definitely needs some time before things settle.

Good for you mate. We're on your side. You wanna come here and complain we even have a Rant thread.

You're amongst friends.

And it could always be worse. Right now she's upset. She could have gotten sick! Better to be upset. And they'll get over it somehow and if they don't, well you can't change who you are. Nor should you have to!

NOTE: Member, Tomasia uses this site to slander other individuals. He then later proclaims it a joke, but not in public.
I will call him a liar and a dog here and now.
Banjo.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
25-08-2015, 11:19 AM
RE: Worst way to find out
Ha! Now you have 2 rep points!

Showoff! Wink

NOTE: Member, Tomasia uses this site to slander other individuals. He then later proclaims it a joke, but not in public.
I will call him a liar and a dog here and now.
Banjo.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Banjo's post
27-08-2015, 09:53 AM (This post was last modified: 27-08-2015 09:58 AM by gnarlynewt.)
RE: Worst way to find out
Update (if anyone cares). Definitely NOT getting to the point where they're coming around yet. My mom's emails went to emotional pleas, over the top preaching, and guilt trips. After trying to as gently as possible to bring it back around into some resemblance of rational discourse, I gave her some time after just getting more of the same about how much of a disappointment I am. It's a little irritating that I'm the one accused of being hurtful when that's all she's throwing in my face, apparently it's ok if she's hurtful 'cause Jebus. My dad has been worryingly silent. He's always been the more conservative religious one. Then I got an email from him this morning. Funny how I have no problem arguing with fundamentalists online, but just seeing an email from my dad in my inbox causes my heart to skip a beat. But I was actually sort of excited that it was full of questions and it seemed he wanted to understand. Even though some of the questions were stuff that usually grates on me, like "where do your morals come from" or "how can you not see and experience god in his creation", but I was actually happy to explain things for him and I know this is all new for him. Good thing I started writing a response to his questions before I finished reading the whole email, because it went off the rails quicker than you can say the devil made me do it. The last two paragraphs were just accusing me of being influenced by Satan and how he'll never accept my being an atheist because it's letting the devil win and he's "declaring war on Satan" and I'm destroying my life by rebelling etc etc. And apparently this is worse than if I was a drug addict. As someone who has had friends' lives destroyed by drugs I found that sort of bullshit enraging, especially as I have my shit pretty together (and they were remarking on how together I was only a week ago). I kept it civil, but made it clear that if this was going to be a one way conversation to reconvert me through attempts at emotional manipulation and calling me an evil disappointment controlled by Satan then this conversation is over. I'm more than happy having a heated discussion, but attacks on my character and no attempt at a mutual exchange of ideas is not a discussion. It's not really exaggerating that each email seems to end with a version of "the power of Christ compels you!" I'm not sure how possible it is to have a real discussion with emotionally charged fundamentalist parents, I know others have done it so I guess there's hope, but fuck this is exhausting. I just want to go on living my life, but apparently that's too much to ask. Banjo's "fuck them" comment is getting more appealing by the minute.

Anyways, end rant. Thank you all for the supportive comments, it's been helpful to just waste time hanging out here lately even if I'm too drained from family shit to feel like I can contribute much right now.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes gnarlynewt's post
27-08-2015, 09:57 AM
RE: Worst way to find out
(25-08-2015 11:19 AM)Banjo Wrote:  Ha! Now you have 2 rep points!

Showoff! Wink

I have 4 now! Now I have evidence I'm not a complete disappointment! Big Grin
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
Post Reply
Forum Jump: