Would Someone Please Talk to Me?
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09-07-2013, 01:22 PM
RE: Would Someone Please Talk to Me?
(09-07-2013 12:06 PM)Anjele Wrote:  Being alone is okay, if you want to be alone...being lonely stinks.

Lots of good people here. You may well find a connection with some.

Are you currently on any meds for depression (as you mention)?

I indeed hope to make a connection.

Yes, I am on antidepressants, fluoxetine and mirtazapine. It is only recently that the mirtazapine was added to my regimen, and it seems to have made all the difference, as far as the major depression is concerned. When I began the mirtazapine, my affect improved within days. Later, due to a fubar at the pharmacy, I was without it for about a week, and I plunged right back where I had been. When the problem was resolved and I was back on mirtazapine, I saw a quick improvement. So, by John Stuart Mill's Method of Subtraction, I conclude that mirtapazapine is causal to the improvement in my affect. I wonder about the fluoxetine, but am loathe to do any experimenting.

Unfortunately, drugs do not create companionship.

"I like theories you can test."
-- Sheldon Glashow

When in doubt, eat chocolate.
If doubt persists, have a hot fudge sundae.
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09-07-2013, 01:51 PM
RE: Would Someone Please Talk to Me?
Cool, now that you are feeling better...and don't play too much with meds that are working and don't just stop them...maybe you can start looking around with clearer vision.

I am not sure if you are looking in real life for a partner/lover or just contact with people. Either way, get out of the house when you can and do something you enjoy, you may meet others that enjoy the same thing. Start making simple contact even it is just a smile and a hello. You just have to start.

See here they are, the bruises, some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. -JF
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09-07-2013, 02:47 PM
RE: Would Someone Please Talk to Me?
I have been looking online and haven't been able to find what I was searching for. I haven't lived in that area for years but still have family up that way. My sister was telling me about a program they have in Washington County (although I think you are in Allegheny, right?). Its a redevelopment/housing program. I'm not certain on all the details but I know many people have been using it to do upgrades on their homes since so many in that region are so old and need major work. Basically they give you the funds to do the renovation, someone comes to inspect it, and then I think?? you agree to live there for a certain amount of time. I have the link for Washington County, but couldn't find one for Allegheny. I hope it helps get your bathroom spiffy.

wash county redevelopment

"Life is a daring adventure or it is nothing"--Helen Keller
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13-07-2013, 05:25 PM
RE: Would Someone Please Talk to Me?
dclarion, my 21 year old daughter is transgender and suffers from depression. At one point it was so severe that she was diagnosed with schizophrenia and even exhibited many of the classic schizophrenic symptoms of hearing voices and paranoia. She was put on anti-psychotics and anti-depressants from which she responded very well. After two years of trying to find a decent therapist who knew about someone who is both transgender and schizophrenic we found a psychologist who had worked with both transgender people and schizophrenia. The psychologist recognized very quickly that she wasn't schizophrenic but was suffering from psychotic depression brought on by suppressing her female brain and trying to remain male all through her childhood adolescence.

We had no idea she was feeling this way growing up. No idea at all. And when she told me at 18 years that she was transgender I will admit that I was dumbfounded and in disbelief. It took a while but my husband and I came to understand what she has gone through and we are accepting of her. As a mother I need to support my children in whatever makes them happy. I what her to thrive as female, not become suicidal and despair as a male.

She keeps to herself just like you and has a few friends who have stuck by her. I think that's been the hardest thing, to watch some of her friends disappear.

One thing I noticed was when I took her to the hairdresser to have her hair styled it made a huge difference in her psyche and happiness level. Plucking the eyebrows helped. The hormones have made a big difference. Very slowly a new person is emerging but it's taking time. She dropped out of college over two years ago to transition and we are hoping to see her return in the fall.

dclarion, there is a much bigger and better world for those who are transgender than in the past. There are online transgender forums and as someone already mentioned there are Meetup groups for transgender people. The world isn't totally hopeless. It is slowly, oh, ever so slowly, changing each day and becoming more accepting of the great variety of gender and sexuality.

If you could somehow make contact with other transgender women and get some help to feminize and align your body with your female brain it would probably help. There might be group therapy you could become apart of. Are you seeing a psychologist and if so how often? My daughter goes twice a week but we have very good insurance.

Find a open minded hair dresser. Most hair dressers have a network of people they know and might be able to put you in contact with others who walk in your shoes. It might sound silly but it's a start. And as others have mentioned, perhaps a change of housing would help.

As for your intelligence, my transgender daughter is also very intelligent. With the right partner who enjoys brainy women it can make for a great and worthwhile relationship.

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
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