Writers?
Post Reply
 
Thread Rating:
  • 1 Votes - 5 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
07-01-2012, 11:25 PM
RE: Writers?
If any of you are willing to share, I'd be glad to read! I guess I should be the first since I keep demanding so. This is a part I just began writing at the end of last year and is a prologue. It reveals two of my protagonists/antagonists and parts of the plot which will be the focus of the story. I unfortunately couldn't include Huluhot(A religious fanatic who starts a holy war but I may reveal more of him in the future) or Ari who is a middle eastern teenager who sees the invasion of her country and tries to survive the brutality of war.

Again, if any of you are willing to share I'd be glad to read. I like the ideas of your stories Douglas and hope you continue on with them! I believe no idea should be abandoned! Unless its about sparkling vampires and hundreds of pages of insanely cliche romance. Other then that, I believe all ideas should be continued!

I'm just joking about the referance but please try to continue Douglas.

---

"Anti-Nuclear Ballistic System operating in... 3... 2... 1... Network established."

The world had become silent.

Hykos

Hykos looked over all the data he was retrieving. China collapsing from the weight of its rebellions and the United Nations supporting those factions for a China reformed under Capitalism. Since the threat of nuclear arms was nonapparent. Countries like Cuba, North Korea and even Iran who had recently just gained its power were being overwhelmed and invaded. It was what they deserved. Their foolishness to hide themselves behind something that was never intended for fear. Something cowardly instead of forming a nation under intelligence like many others. It was this reason the leaders of the system were non-nuclear powers like South Korea and Finland.

Hykos felt a sense of relief, as if his heart had stopped to enjoy the moment a bit longer. The system was created with a numerous amount of satellites and integrated with the international ballistic missiles system. The satellites constantly scanned the Earth for any unauthorized airborne object and if given the permission too, would have the ability to destroy it within seconds. The U.N. chose numerous countries to be the front of this sytem, trying to cover as much land as possible in case of a nuclear launch from any region, especially within the CORE nations. The United States and Russia held most of the IBMs, although the leader of the satellite system would be Japan. Giving the power to a nation that had suffered from the weapons brutality first. Would be a way to balance this power among nations.

Hykos could feel his heart clench from reminding himself of the events. He had to make sure that his past deeds were reprimanded by what he did now. Some of the affects still represented by the marks of needles and surgical incisions he had done unto himself.

He turned too the bed next to him. Staring at the face resting beside him. The one he had done everything for. The blood he had shed and had lost.

As the time passed and as he listened to the monitor slow, he wrapped his fingers around the hand of his daugher. He was amazed how cold he felt against her, how pale his hand seemed against his.
He lay there thinking.

---

Liquid

Liquid stared at the smashed monitor, his fist aching as a red puddle formed on the edge of the tabletop.

Hykos had beaten him. The Titan project wasn't a new sort of weapon of mass destruction. Instead it was counter. Liquid had been fooled this whole time in destroying nuclear labs he expected housed plans for the unit. Now he realized all he had accomplished was rid the world of something now considered useless. He clutched at the monitor. Any missiles leaving countries would be instantly eradicated. He could detonate them within the country or try to sneak them through the borders but with the world as it was. It wouldn't be simple.

The screen flickered, it revealed reports of the news. "Vietnam controlled by UN, Laos and Cambodia being targeted next to be liberated from the Chimera Rouge terrorist organization which has received weapons and funds from CORE... Kazahkastan was overrun by a coalition of Russian tanks and British air force units led by General Aran Dram. His forces are predicted to seize the capital within two days and eliminate any rebellious units which are suspected of conduct with CORE. Africa has still remained a home for CORE operations and the U.N. Is currently constructing a plan which minimizes civilian deaths but maximizes asaults on CORE's operations on the continent."

He had to leave now, CORE was about to cease to exist. He would have to find an alternative, but seeing how much time left it'd be impossible. He raised his revolver and fired at the equipment in the room. All information had to be destroyed. He was going to obliterate the facility just in case... He looked at the monitor again and his eyes widened.

"Breaking News!! Numerous reports of bombings are being reported within Europe and the United States. Currently the reports are not linked with CORE. Any further information will be reported when received..."

Liquid hadn't organized any counter attack.

His room was engulfed in fire.

"Mankind must put an end to war, or war will put an end to mankind." -John F Kennedy

The way to see by Faith is to shut the eye of Reason.” -Benjamin Franklin

It has been a long time. How have you been?
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
08-01-2012, 05:09 AM
RE: Writers?
Shiruba, very interesting story. At least the beginning is interesting. I'd love to read more if you want to share.

As for me, I am still not exactly sure how to write my book.
My very first attempt was to write only the main story but you would sit there clueless why they act as they do. So I tried to fondle in some details but it made the whole thing look like patchwork. Then I started over intending to have all the storylines meet at some point but it became surreal even for the world I was building. So I tried to write it like three books but that is weird as I want to show how that world works, how people and government are.
Currently I am thinking about having a prologue explaining the world and then go with the main story, but I realize that the prologue alone would be many chapters long and a 100 pages prologue might be a bit weird.
So this is my block right now.

Yesterday I started over, just hopping right into the story but writing it in english and having it sound good is a little difficult. My english is fluent but my previous attempt to write the story were in my native language (German)... We'll see the result Big Grin

[Image: 69p7qx.gif]
Visit this user's website Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Leela's post
08-01-2012, 04:43 PM
RE: Writers?
I plan to learn the languages of the world. They all sound extravagant in their own ways.

I tried to portray as much detail on events while still showing you the brim on things I hope to expand later. Like CORE, the bombing appearing around the country and who these two men are. I understand how difficult it is to create a universe and a very real one. I try to use history and facts to help. Like the Anti-Nuclear Defense System(ANDS) I took from a project Reagan developed to try and defend our country from nuclear missiles(His was named BMDO.) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Strategic_D...Initiative

So what are you trying to do with your story currently? Would you care to share any parts of it? How are the people and government in your story?

"Mankind must put an end to war, or war will put an end to mankind." -John F Kennedy

The way to see by Faith is to shut the eye of Reason.” -Benjamin Franklin

It has been a long time. How have you been?
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
09-01-2012, 02:44 AM
RE: Writers?
Well the story has three parts that mix together.
One part is the government, officials and laws. The laws got very strict but are enforced differently (more later). The government has a lot of professionals, there aren't a lot of the "bad people" any more and no immunity for politicians. Officials take their job very serious and are trusted but they stick to the letter. For example there is a law that shops of the same kind have to offer the same things and are not allowed to have different prices. Shops can only be opened in certain areas so that there is never a too large or too low number in an area. (this is where one parts connects to the other part)
So in this part of the story we meet Robert. He is a shop owner. A customer complained that he does not have the same brand of one article as is available in another shop. His punishment is the exact same as for every other crime in that world. He is being put into the <...> (I haven't found a good word in english yet). It is a whole big city that noone can leave. Every criminal, goes there. People like Robert, murderers, thieves, etc. I am painting how it is to live there. People are born there and die there. Bad medical care, low ressources, for short, survival of the fittest. There is only one way to leave, it is a program where you have to take place, if you survive you are free.
Here I have a cut in the story.
In this world there is also one kind of people... more or less superpeople. There is a test from the government to see if you are one of these because it is not genetic inherited, it appears randomly. Those who pass that test go to a "campus". The test takes place at a young age, so when you come to the campus you are 3 or 4 years old. These people learn faster and more, their brains work differently. Also their bones and muscles are different. They are taught everything there is, driving all kinds of vehicles, everything you can learn theoretical (maths, physics, biology, languages, ....) up to a university level. So what comes out there are very skilled and professional people.
And the story itself evolves around these people. As I said pretty much endtime, catastrophy....

Lol alone the description is a novel already Big Grin

[Image: 69p7qx.gif]
Visit this user's website Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Leela's post
09-01-2012, 03:09 AM
RE: Writers?
Try to make it work! I wish you would actually show a piece of writing instead of description! I'm sorry if I'm asking for a lot and I understand English isn't your first language. So the problem you continue to have is you can't integrate these three ideas together?

I'll reply more tomorrow, my lack of sleep is causing me to begin making errors.

I'll continue to share and hope others do as well.

"Mankind must put an end to war, or war will put an end to mankind." -John F Kennedy

The way to see by Faith is to shut the eye of Reason.” -Benjamin Franklin

It has been a long time. How have you been?
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
09-01-2012, 04:16 AM
RE: Writers?
There isn't really anything to show yet, it is more difficult to write a story in a language that is not your native one. And as I am starting over it takes some time. I just restarted on Saturday and it is not a lot yet and it is not ready to be shown because it sounds stupid right now. In my native language I had about 100 pages already but as I said, I don't have it here. So please be patient

[Image: 69p7qx.gif]
Visit this user's website Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
09-01-2012, 02:20 PM
RE: Writers?
Sorry if I sound very impatient. I abandoned writing for a while and recently started again last year. I hope you succeed and I find it amazing you are trying to write it in your secondary language.

Sorry again and I plan on sharing more very soon.

"Mankind must put an end to war, or war will put an end to mankind." -John F Kennedy

The way to see by Faith is to shut the eye of Reason.” -Benjamin Franklin

It has been a long time. How have you been?
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
09-01-2012, 06:51 PM
RE: Writers?
I consider myself a writer. It took me a year to finish my first novel, and about six months to finish the first draft of my second one. Now, the road to publication is a different process...a long, slow, torturing process. I'm willing to wait though. Tongue
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
10-01-2012, 09:17 AM
RE: Writers?
I used to know one of those people who are reading through your stuff to correct mistakes and shorten out some things. For some reason he hated his job, I have no clue why because I would love to do that. Even if there is a boring or stupid book every now and then.
Anyway, when I started writing my book (years ago) I researched publishers and how long it takes to get it approved and released. and it was a minimum of 2 years where I wanted it to be printed. But that is a very well known business with a good reputation.
Anyway, now as I am writing it in English, no clue where I would like it to be printed. I don't want a publisher with a bad reputation because as a writer you never lose the bad image in such a case. Either a good one or not at all, my opinion.

Anyone has a hint about that? I am in Ireland so of course an Irish publisher would be good, not essential but good.

[Image: 69p7qx.gif]
Visit this user's website Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
10-01-2012, 11:59 PM
RE: Writers?
No idea, I have never thought about actually publishing my book. I'm sorry I'm not much help.

"Mankind must put an end to war, or war will put an end to mankind." -John F Kennedy

The way to see by Faith is to shut the eye of Reason.” -Benjamin Franklin

It has been a long time. How have you been?
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
Post Reply
Forum Jump: