Your Ass and You
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18-04-2015, 08:37 AM
Your Ass and You
In a body that contains the brain and the heart, our language (at least in English-speaking countries) seems to indicate we place the most value of all on our ass. So much so in fact, we self-identify with our ass. Our ass is us. The references in slang are numerous:

It's going to be your ass!
You're going to lose your ass!
Your ass is mine, sucker!
Your ass is grass and I'm the lawnmower!
Your mouth should never write checks that your ass can't cover.
I'm going to kick your ass!
You can bet your ass on it!
I better see your ass at the meeting tomorrow!
Get your ass over here!
You're not going to see my ass in that contraption!
You better haul ass!
What a pain in the ass!
Your ass is going to regret this.

It's an interesting cultural phenomena and I don't know what it says about us. I can't help wonder what psychological effect it has on children as they learn from schoolyard talk that the most noble part of them is their ass. Is this why so many of them grow up to be assholes?

I'm curious if anyone knows of any non-English-speaking cultures with a similar fixation. I'd hate to think it's a human thing because if it is, we're fucked up the ass.
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18-04-2015, 09:20 AM
RE: Your Ass and You
I don't know if it's culture-specific, but we definitely have lots of expressions that include the word "ass" in them in Greek.
A simple search gave me a list with about a hundred of them.

Some interesting Greek ones translated:

Does your ass have worms/thorns? (Why can't you just sit down and stay still for a moment?)

Lay your ass down. (Start working/doing something laborious)

They're like ass and panties. (They're best friends/always together)

I've become (like) an ass. (I got all dirty/wet)

If you jump too many poles, one will get in your ass. (This one is obvious I think)

Silk panties need skillful asses. (I think this is obvious too)

Your ass wants them. (You're asking for trouble)


There must be some significance to our butts, which I can only assume derives from the fact that primitive men mainly saw a woman's butt during sex and it must have been the center of attention at all times, as well as the fact that our butts are actually the base of our torso.

I'm no expert though.

"Behind every great pirate, there is a great butt."
-Guybrush Threepwood-
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18-04-2015, 09:29 AM
RE: Your Ass and You
(18-04-2015 09:20 AM)undergroundp Wrote:  If you jump too many poles, one will get in your ass. (This one is obvious I think)

I like that one. We need to adopt in in English.


old joke:

All the organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who was the one in charge.
"I should be in charge," said the brain, "Because I run all the body's systems, so without me nothing would happen."
"I should be in charge," said the blood , "because I circulate oxygen all over so without me you'd all waste away."
"I should be in charge," said the stomach , "because I process food and give all of you energy."
"I should be in charge," said the legs , "because I carry the body wherever it needs to go."
"I should be in charge," said the eyes, "Because I allow the body to see where it goes."
"I should be in charge," said the rectum , "Because I'm responsible for waste removal."
All the other body parts laughed at the rectum and insulted him, so in a huff, he shut down tight.
Within a few days, the brain had a terrible headache, the stomach was bloated, the legs got wobbly, the eyes got watery, and the blood was toxic. They all decided that the rectum should be the boss.
MORAL OF THE STORY: NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE, OR HOW IMPORTANT YOU THINK YOU ARE, YOU WILL FIND THAT IT IS ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE THAT IS IN CHARGE

Atheism: it's not just for communists any more!
America July 4 1776 - November 8 2016 RIP
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18-04-2015, 10:31 AM
RE: Your Ass and You
(18-04-2015 09:20 AM)undergroundp Wrote:  If you jump too many poles, one will get in your ass. (This one is obvious I think)

I didn't realize Poles had a thing for sodomy. Odd.
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18-04-2015, 11:00 AM
RE: Your Ass and You
Arse.

Drinking Beverage

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18-04-2015, 11:15 AM
RE: Your Ass and You
So the ass has moved to here too. Guess I move my AF reply also.

Most of the expressions also exist in German. There are even additional ass-expressions that aren't really translatable, such as - in an attempt to translate anyway - "you're going on my ass", meaning, leave me alone or even you're a pain in my ass. Also there's a expression I'm rather fond of: "I ask my ass if he's interested", meaning, keep talking, I'm not buying. It also varries greatly between regions and countries. Especially finding the appropriate expression for ass in the right moment is rather difficult, since there are numerous to bring the message across.

What's rather unique to english speaking countries is the universal use of fuck. Also asswipe in all it's meanings isn't popular in German speaking countries.
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18-04-2015, 11:30 AM
RE: Your Ass and You
Smells like ass.

There is only one really serious philosophical question, and that is suicide. -Camus
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18-04-2015, 12:07 PM
RE: Your Ass and You
(18-04-2015 11:00 AM)DLJ Wrote:  Arse.

Drinking Beverage

Bullshit. The non-word 'arse' was coined by people obsessed with avoiding so-called 'bad words' like 'ass'. There are already plenty of words with multiple meanings so if you have an agenda against that, you have a lot of other new words to invent.
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18-04-2015, 12:17 PM
RE: Your Ass and You
As an American, the only way I use arse is in variations of the phrase "I can't be arsed to..."

I thought some of the phrases utilizing ass were derived from meaning the donkey and not our posteriors.

I tend to say jackass a lot more than using asswipe. (I say douchebag more than jackass)

My personal word obsession is fuck and it's many uses - gerund, participle, noun, verb, adverb, exclamation

Also it's many meanings, for example - Fuck you vs Let's fuck.

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18-04-2015, 01:53 PM
RE: Your Ass and You
(18-04-2015 12:17 PM)Nurse Wrote:  As an American, the only way I use arse is in variations of the phrase "I can't be arsed to..."

I thought some of the phrases utilizing ass were derived from meaning the donkey and not our posteriors.

I tend to say jackass a lot more than using asswipe. (I say douchebag more than jackass)

My personal word obsession is fuck and it's many uses - gerund, participle, noun, verb, adverb, exclamation

Also it's many meanings, for example - Fuck you vs Let's fuck.

Well, I wasn't intending to compete with the word, "fuck." That is indeed the universal word and trying to compete with it would be folly.

I was simply meaning to point out the obsession with a rather inglorious part of one's body and the cultural (or even humanistic) preoccupation with it.
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