animals on the ark
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06-05-2016, 02:32 PM
RE: animals on the ark
(06-05-2016 10:03 AM)Jewelarcher Wrote:  
(06-05-2016 09:15 AM)Leo Wrote:  I think you are confusing Noah with Chuck Norris.

I thought you said chuck Norris was god?

God wants to be Chuck Norris when he grows up.

I have my doubts.

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06-05-2016, 02:37 PM
RE: animals on the ark
(06-05-2016 01:10 AM)Shadow Fox Wrote:  What about the bugs?

What about venereal diseases? Who do you think the lucky couple that brought the clap aboard the ark were? Sounds like somebody was a good deal less holy than the tales make out.

Who do you think the lucky soul was that had cholera? Answer: All of them after the first 4 days in an enclosed wooden structure bouncing through the tempest. That must have been memorable.

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06-05-2016, 02:48 PM
RE: animals on the ark
(06-05-2016 06:56 AM)CosmicRaven Wrote:  Man, the animals, especially the carnivorous ones, must have been starving after the flood.

Before, during and after. Forty days of downpoor, another few months of floating aimlessly and then...

Noah beaches the Ark on the now barren slopes of Mount Ararat. The doors open and the emaciated animals plod forth into a wasteland covered in salted sediment. Seeing a wee bit of a walk ahead of it the Tasmanian Devil pounces first and the Thompson's gazelle goes extinct. It is only the first of many. Given the typical 10:1 prey to predator ratio you're looking at total ecosystem collapse by nightfall. Not that the death of all land plants hadn't already accomplished that.

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06-05-2016, 02:59 PM
RE: animals on the ark
(06-05-2016 12:35 PM)Jewelarcher Wrote:  I love the majority of the answers here. You guys are amazing.

Honestly, the entire flood myth is a pretty soft target. It's completely implausible in almost every way and all attempts at making it work without miracles end up killling everybody involved in many gruesome and horrifying ways. Explaining the waters alone typically involves more destructive power than a full-blown nuclear holocaust and the worst notions will remove the planet's crust entirely.

The challenge is finding any part of the story that makes sense.

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06-05-2016, 03:04 PM
RE: animals on the ark
(06-05-2016 02:59 PM)Paleophyte Wrote:  
(06-05-2016 12:35 PM)Jewelarcher Wrote:  I love the majority of the answers here. You guys are amazing.


The challenge is finding any part of the story that makes sense.

He built the boat with wood.

"If you keep trying to better yourself that's enough for me. We don't decide which hand we are dealt in life, but we make the decision to play it or fold it" - Nishi Karano Kaze
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06-05-2016, 03:08 PM
RE: animals on the ark
(06-05-2016 02:48 PM)Paleophyte Wrote:  Before, during and after. Forty days of downpoor, another few months of floating aimlessly and then...

Noah beaches the Ark on the now barren slopes of Mount Ararat. The doors open and the emaciated animals plod forth into a wasteland covered in salted sediment. Seeing a wee bit of a walk ahead of it the Tasmanian Devil pounces first and the Thompson's gazelle goes extinct. It is only the first of many. Given the typical 10:1 prey to predator ratio you're looking at total ecosystem collapse by nightfall. Not that the death of all land plants hadn't already accomplished that.

I've also read about the poor Pandas having to bring along their own bamboo shoots and the Koala's with their eucalyptus. Noah would not have been able to go out gathering all the food every single animal needed, so the only other option is they had to bring it themselves, that's a lot of carry ons. Then after they left the Ark they needed to travel all the way to China and Australia to hopefully get more food that would've been wiped out in the flood.

It's seriously incredible to me that anyone could believe Noah's story is factual. Just imagine Noah and his family tending to the needs of millions of species? It's just not possible.

If God wanted to kill everyone, just kill them, snap your figures and stop their hearts or something simple and painless. Drowning is a terrible way to die and saving a few doesn't make it any better. That's like a serial killer wiping out an entire family except the two youngest kids and acting like he did them a favor.

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06-05-2016, 03:14 PM
RE: animals on the ark
(06-05-2016 03:04 PM)JDog554 Wrote:  
(06-05-2016 02:59 PM)Paleophyte Wrote:  The challenge is finding any part of the story that makes sense.

He built the boat with wood.

The ark built of straw blew away. As for the ark built of bricks...

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06-05-2016, 03:19 PM
RE: animals on the ark
(06-05-2016 02:32 PM)Paleophyte Wrote:  God wants to be Chuck Norris when he grows up.

God can never be Chuck Norris. God will not grow up.

#sigh
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06-05-2016, 03:38 PM
RE: animals on the ark
(06-05-2016 03:04 PM)JDog554 Wrote:  
(06-05-2016 02:59 PM)Paleophyte Wrote:  The challenge is finding any part of the story that makes sense.

He built the boat with wood.

He alone ? With his barehands ? In a short time? That looks more like a Chuck Norris feat.

Religion is bullshit. The winner of the last person to post wins thread.Yes
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06-05-2016, 03:41 PM
RE: animals on the ark
(06-05-2016 10:03 AM)Jewelarcher Wrote:  
(06-05-2016 09:15 AM)Leo Wrote:  I think you are confusing Noah with Chuck Norris.

I thought you said chuck Norris was god?

Actually comparing chuck Norris with a man made God is blasphemy. Be careful or Chuck Norris will roundhouse kick you to oblivion.

Religion is bullshit. The winner of the last person to post wins thread.Yes
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