bigfoot technology
Post Reply
 
Thread Rating:
  • 0 Votes - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
09-12-2015, 06:21 PM
bigfoot technology
Ever wonder why no one can seem to kill or capture Bigfoots? All anyone can seem to find are footprints and pubic tufts. Well, there is a reason. Bigfoots posess technology millions of years in advance to the pinnacle of modern human tech. With a scratch of tge naval, bigfoots activate a cloaking device implanted just under the skin. With a pick of the nose, they can teleport distances of about a half-mile. Licking tge right branches on particular trees deep in the forest, the bark opens back to reveal long range telepods to beam them up to one of several floating antigravity cities around earth, likewise equipped with cloaking devices, radar countermeasures, emp beams, and Wi-Fi. The cities themselves are beyond beautiful, even more so than Heaven and Atlantis combined. Here the bigfoots live their lives in relative peace. They have aerial scout vehicles, which layman identify as flying saucers. Usually cloaked, they're occasionally piloted by drunk bigfoot teenagers out for a thrill. The cloaking devices are turned off, as bigfoots are aware of how easy it is to fuck with humans, and occasionally a human is abducted. A popular game is to place the human on a table, distract the frightened creature with gremlin puppets (toys for bigfoot children), and then shove a dildo up the human's ass. Bigfoots stay out of human affairs, not because of some prime directive forbidding it, but simply because humans are annoying, overly melodramatic, and just plain boring. They prefer their lives in the sky (and occasional trips to tge surface to check in on top secret projects) and would rather not bother themselves with answering tge humans' pointless questions about the lives of tge voices that live in human heads.

*This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual bigfoots, real or hallucinated, is entirely coincidental. Anyone can make shit up. Never believe anything.

Don't let those gnomes and their illusions get you down. They're just gnomes and illusions.

--Jake the Dog, Adventure Time

Alouette, je te plumerai.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 3 users Like Old Man Marsh's post
09-12-2015, 07:55 PM
RE: bigfoot technology
That was different Big Grin Thanks for sharing your story--it was a lil bizarre-but good Thumbsup

On a side note, I would love to go hiking and backpacking in "Big Foot" country in real life. I don't believe in Big Foot but I still think it's fun to think "what if." I also like haunted inns--again I don't believe in ghosts but it's fun to pretend and hear the stories of the innkeepers about the ghosts that supposedly haunt their properties. Some of the stories can be quite romantic Wink

"Let the waters settle and you will see the moon and stars mirrored in your own being." -Rumi
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 2 users Like jennybee's post
09-12-2015, 08:06 PM
RE: bigfoot technology
(09-12-2015 06:21 PM)Old Man Marsh Wrote:  Ever wonder why no one can seem to kill or capture Bigfoots? All anyone can seem to find are footprints and pubic tufts. Well, there is a reason. Bigfoots posess technology millions of years in advance to the pinnacle of modern human tech. With a scratch of tge naval, bigfoots activate a cloaking device implanted just under the skin. With a pick of the nose, they can teleport distances of about a half-mile. Licking tge right branches on particular trees deep in the forest, the bark opens back to reveal long range telepods to beam them up to one of several floating antigravity cities around earth, likewise equipped with cloaking devices, radar countermeasures, emp beams, and Wi-Fi. The cities themselves are beyond beautiful, even more so than Heaven and Atlantis combined. Here the bigfoots live their lives in relative peace. They have aerial scout vehicles, which layman identify as flying saucers. Usually cloaked, they're occasionally piloted by drunk bigfoot teenagers out for a thrill. The cloaking devices are turned off, as bigfoots are aware of how easy it is to fuck with humans, and occasionally a human is abducted. A popular game is to place the human on a table, distract the frightened creature with gremlin puppets (toys for bigfoot children), and then shove a dildo up the human's ass. Bigfoots stay out of human affairs, not because of some prime directive forbidding it, but simply because humans are annoying, overly melodramatic, and just plain boring. They prefer their lives in the sky (and occasional trips to tge surface to check in on top secret projects) and would rather not bother themselves with answering tge humans' pointless questions about the lives of tge voices that live in human heads.

I never realised you had such an upbringing. Gasp

Tongue

NOTE: Member, Tomasia uses this site to slander other individuals. He then later proclaims it a joke, but not in public.
I will call him a liar and a dog here and now.
Banjo.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 2 users Like Banjo's post
09-12-2015, 09:13 PM
RE: bigfoot technology
The things I learn in this forum.

Smartass

Live Better...Help Often....Wonder More
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 2 users Like OhDannyBoy's post
14-12-2015, 10:05 PM
RE: bigfoot technology
(09-12-2015 06:21 PM)Old Man Marsh Wrote:  Ever wonder why no one can seem to kill or capture Bigfoots? All anyone can seem to find are footprints and pubic tufts. Well, there is a reason. Bigfoots posess technology millions of years in advance to the pinnacle of modern human tech. With a scratch of tge naval, bigfoots activate a cloaking device implanted just under the skin. With a pick of the nose, they can teleport distances of about a half-mile. Licking tge right branches on particular trees deep in the forest, the bark opens back to reveal long range telepods to beam them up to one of several floating antigravity cities around earth, likewise equipped with cloaking devices, radar countermeasures, emp beams, and Wi-Fi. The cities themselves are beyond beautiful, even more so than Heaven and Atlantis combined. Here the bigfoots live their lives in relative peace. They have aerial scout vehicles, which layman identify as flying saucers. Usually cloaked, they're occasionally piloted by drunk bigfoot teenagers out for a thrill. The cloaking devices are turned off, as bigfoots are aware of how easy it is to fuck with humans, and occasionally a human is abducted. A popular game is to place the human on a table, distract the frightened creature with gremlin puppets (toys for bigfoot children), and then shove a dildo up the human's ass. Bigfoots stay out of human affairs, not because of some prime directive forbidding it, but simply because humans are annoying, overly melodramatic, and just plain boring. They prefer their lives in the sky (and occasional trips to tge surface to check in on top secret projects) and would rather not bother themselves with answering tge humans' pointless questions about the lives of tge voices that live in human heads.

*This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual bigfoots, real or hallucinated, is entirely coincidental. Anyone can make shit up. Never believe anything.

Bigfoot tangled with Steve Austin once, they've left us alone since that day:




Gods derive their power from post-hoc rationalizations. -The Inquisition

Using the supernatural to explain events in your life is a failure of the intellect to comprehend the world around you. -The Inquisition
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 4 users Like TheInquisition's post
15-12-2015, 11:34 AM
RE: bigfoot technology
(14-12-2015 10:05 PM)TheInquisition Wrote:  
(09-12-2015 06:21 PM)Old Man Marsh Wrote:  Ever wonder why no one can seem to kill or capture Bigfoots? All anyone can seem to find are footprints and pubic tufts. Well, there is a reason. Bigfoots posess technology millions of years in advance to the pinnacle of modern human tech. With a scratch of tge naval, bigfoots activate a cloaking device implanted just under the skin. With a pick of the nose, they can teleport distances of about a half-mile. Licking tge right branches on particular trees deep in the forest, the bark opens back to reveal long range telepods to beam them up to one of several floating antigravity cities around earth, likewise equipped with cloaking devices, radar countermeasures, emp beams, and Wi-Fi. The cities themselves are beyond beautiful, even more so than Heaven and Atlantis combined. Here the bigfoots live their lives in relative peace. They have aerial scout vehicles, which layman identify as flying saucers. Usually cloaked, they're occasionally piloted by drunk bigfoot teenagers out for a thrill. The cloaking devices are turned off, as bigfoots are aware of how easy it is to fuck with humans, and occasionally a human is abducted. A popular game is to place the human on a table, distract the frightened creature with gremlin puppets (toys for bigfoot children), and then shove a dildo up the human's ass. Bigfoots stay out of human affairs, not because of some prime directive forbidding it, but simply because humans are annoying, overly melodramatic, and just plain boring. They prefer their lives in the sky (and occasional trips to tge surface to check in on top secret projects) and would rather not bother themselves with answering tge humans' pointless questions about the lives of tge voices that live in human heads.

*This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual bigfoots, real or hallucinated, is entirely coincidental. Anyone can make shit up. Never believe anything.

Bigfoot tangled with Steve Austin once, they've left us alone since that day:




Ahhh true love




(31-07-2014 04:37 PM)Luminon Wrote:  America is full of guns, but they're useless, because nobody has the courage to shoot an IRS agent in self-defense
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Revenant77x's post
15-12-2015, 12:15 PM
RE: bigfoot technology
How many people have been shot because they where dressing in a Bigfoot costume?

Don't Live each day like it's your last. Live each day like you have 541 days after that one where every choice you make will have lasting implications to you and the world around you. ~ Tim Minchin
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Commonsensei's post
15-12-2015, 02:21 PM
RE: bigfoot technology
(15-12-2015 12:15 PM)Commonsensei Wrote:  How many people have been shot because they where dressing in a Bigfoot costume?

I hate to admit I have watched this Finding Bigfoot show...but only because it's kind of hilarious ...




"Let the waters settle and you will see the moon and stars mirrored in your own being." -Rumi
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 2 users Like jennybee's post
15-12-2015, 02:25 PM
RE: bigfoot technology



Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes dancefortwo's post
15-12-2015, 04:00 PM
RE: bigfoot technology
(15-12-2015 02:21 PM)jennybee Wrote:  
(15-12-2015 12:15 PM)Commonsensei Wrote:  How many people have been shot because they where dressing in a Bigfoot costume?

I hate to admit I have watched this Finding Bigfoot show...but only because it's kind of hilarious ...




I've watched the show as well. There "scientific" investigations are laughable. Almost completely relying on personal testimony. I think I get the most frustrated with the "skeptic" of the group. She never comes off to me skeptical to me.

Here's a clip where they interview Eric Cartman.




Don't Live each day like it's your last. Live each day like you have 541 days after that one where every choice you make will have lasting implications to you and the world around you. ~ Tim Minchin
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Commonsensei's post
Post Reply
Forum Jump: