blended family question
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09-11-2015, 01:47 AM
blended family question
A little back ground; I have 3 stepsons. Their mom has been a nightmare to me and my kids. To the point she was told by child services and the police that if she made one more false report against me or my kids she would be arrested. She has accused my son of molesting her son when they were kids. That was the worst one.

Anyway fast foreword close to 8 years now, her 2 oldest can't stand her and moved out. The oldest is 20 and the next is 18. The 18 year old lives with us. The 20 year old just moved back in with his mom.

A little background on him and her relationship, she always made excuses for him and went way overboard with him and let him do whatever he wants. Tje other 2 she was a lot harder on. Why? Because my husband adopted him when he wasa baby and she would always say he doesn't have a real dad. Uuummm OK whatever even though my husband always treated him the same just like his own.

So today his ex called and said she was having problems with the 20 year old. Apparently he is peeing in water bottles and leaving them open in his room. According to her he has like 20 in there and it reaks!!

My question is should we say something to the 20 year old? I mean that is just nasty. My husband says she is afraid of him. But at the same time its her fault for letting him do what ever he wants. O remember when he was younger she would call all the time about him but she wouldn't do anything.

So should he say something or should we let her handle it. ? Thanks
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09-11-2015, 02:09 AM
RE: blended family question
How does he treat you guys when he is at your place?

Normally I wouldn't get involved as she has poisoned the communication between your household and hers. But if he is treating you guys badly too then I'd try to handle that. It sounds to me that she wouldn't really appreciate help. She might even get mad about it.
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09-11-2015, 02:59 AM
RE: blended family question
(09-11-2015 01:47 AM)purpledaisies Wrote:  A little back ground; I have 3 stepsons. Their mom has been a nightmare to me and my kids. To the point she was told by child services and the police that if she made one more false report against me or my kids she would be arrested. She has accused my son of molesting her son when they were kids. That was the worst one.

Anyway fast foreword close to 8 years now, her 2 oldest can't stand her and moved out. The oldest is 20 and the next is 18. The 18 year old lives with us. The 20 year old just moved back in with his mom.

A little background on him and her relationship, she always made excuses for him and went way overboard with him and let him do whatever he wants. Tje other 2 she was a lot harder on. Why? Because my husband adopted him when he wasa baby and she would always say he doesn't have a real dad. Uuummm OK whatever even though my husband always treated him the same just like his own.

So today his ex called and said she was having problems with the 20 year old. Apparently he is peeing in water bottles and leaving them open in his room. According to her he has like 20 in there and it reaks!!

My question is should we say something to the 20 year old? I mean that is just nasty. My husband says she is afraid of him. But at the same time its her fault for letting him do what ever he wants. O remember when he was younger she would call all the time about him but she wouldn't do anything.

So should he say something or should we let her handle it. ? Thanks

I have not read the rest of the thread yet. I'd rather just talk to you right now.

It seems to me you are surrounded by quite a bit of madness. My advice is this; avoid it like the plague. Stay well away. It is not your concern. Howard Hughes peed in bottles and made millions. Hell he even made a thing called the Spruce Goose and never got put away. Perhaps this kid is a genius?

Either way, you have enough on your plate right now. Don't add more to it.

Smile

NOTE: Member, Tomasia uses this site to slander other individuals. He then later proclaims it a joke, but not in public.
I will call him a liar and a dog here and now.
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09-11-2015, 03:30 AM
RE: blended family question
(09-11-2015 02:09 AM)Nishi Karano Kaze Wrote:  How does he treat you guys when he is at your place?

Normally I wouldn't get involved as she has poisoned the communication between your household and hers. But if he is treating you guys badly too then I'd try to handle that. It sounds to me that she wouldn't really appreciate help. She might even get mad about it.

He would dream of doing at our house. My husband is sorta of a neat freek . and he know I'd go blastic on him. He has a problem when he was younger about hitting the youngest and leaving marks on him. It took a few weeks before I got to the point I smaked him with a plastic hanger, the same one he used to hit his brother with. Then I made him write 10 reason why we don't hit and made him read them back to me and made him put it in his wallet to remind himself. I know I shouldnt have used the hanger but I was at my limit. Surprisingly his mom thanked me as never never hit him like that again.

I think at that moment he knew I wouldn't put up with his bull crap.

Ok I think I'll leave it alone for now. Thanks
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09-11-2015, 03:32 AM
RE: blended family question
Good luck. Just remember, everyone is crazy but you. Wink

NOTE: Member, Tomasia uses this site to slander other individuals. He then later proclaims it a joke, but not in public.
I will call him a liar and a dog here and now.
Banjo.
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09-11-2015, 04:57 AM
RE: blended family question
Wut? Your stepson is weird.
Anyway, I wouldn't do shit. He doesn't life at my house, not my problem

I don't really like going outside.
It's too damn "peopley" out there....
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09-11-2015, 06:05 AM
RE: blended family question
(09-11-2015 01:47 AM)purpledaisies Wrote:  A little back ground; I have 3 stepsons. Their mom has been a nightmare to me and my kids. To the point she was told by child services and the police that if she made one more false report against me or my kids she would be arrested. She has accused my son of molesting her son when they were kids. That was the worst one.

Anyway fast foreword close to 8 years now, her 2 oldest can't stand her and moved out. The oldest is 20 and the next is 18. The 18 year old lives with us. The 20 year old just moved back in with his mom.

A little background on him and her relationship, she always made excuses for him and went way overboard with him and let him do whatever he wants. Tje other 2 she was a lot harder on. Why? Because my husband adopted him when he wasa baby and she would always say he doesn't have a real dad. Uuummm OK whatever even though my husband always treated him the same just like his own.

So today his ex called and said she was having problems with the 20 year old. Apparently he is peeing in water bottles and leaving them open in his room. According to her he has like 20 in there and it reaks!!

My question is should we say something to the 20 year old? I mean that is just nasty. My husband says she is afraid of him. But at the same time its her fault for letting him do what ever he wants. O remember when he was younger she would call all the time about him but she wouldn't do anything.

So should he say something or should we let her handle it. ? Thanks

If your husband adopted him since he was a baby then he can talk to him man to man. but personally, if I were you, I'd stay as far as away from it as possible.

1 Like = 1 Prayer
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09-11-2015, 07:29 AM
RE: blended family question
(09-11-2015 03:30 AM)purpledaisies Wrote:  I know I shouldnt have used the hanger

Why not? It worked, didn't it? It you hadn't hit him the other things you did might not have been enough to solve the problem.

The information in ancient libraries came from real minds of real people. The far more complex information in cells came from the far more intelligent mind of God.
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09-11-2015, 07:33 AM
RE: blended family question
Send over an case of empty milk jugs.....

That'll teach her a lesson....


Wink

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The difference between prayer and masturbation - is when a guy is through masturbating - he has something to show for his efforts.
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09-11-2015, 01:26 PM
RE: blended family question
First thing to consider- is what she is saying true? how are you able to know if she is lying to you or telling you the truth?

Second- if you decide she is being honest, he is 20. An adult. I would just have a 'matter of fact' conversation. Your mom called me today. She said you are doing this. She doesn't like it and I agree with her. It's not acceptable. You are an adult and know better. Act better or you will find yourself in a mess of trouble. Consider this your warning.

I try not to sugar coat when there is a clear and firm message I am trying to get across. No need for yelling, just firm and confident.


"Life is a daring adventure or it is nothing"--Helen Keller
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