language and authoritarianism
Post Reply
Thread Rating:
  • 0 Votes - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
22-12-2013, 11:04 PM
language and authoritarianism
I feel like posting a lot today. I guess anytime I have hard tasks ahead of me, like in my studies of accounting, I have to take a lot of distractions. I have to give myself a lot of time. I'm trying to give myself a lot of time, so I don't have to cram anything down my head, which never works, which is not really a part of the learning process but only the cramming process. I want knowledge which can be recalled, which leads to understanding, and ability to analyse and then to ability to evaluate and create. I want to be in the Flow, rather than feel a rush. So anyway, when I have to struggle with something, I have a lot of tension to release. This is one way of doing it.

In my reading of my state's CAFR- Comprehensive Annual Financial Report- I noticed the terms and language they use for some of their state services. They call prisons and jails and so on Correctional Facilities. I knew that. They call things the department of corrections, or corrections, or so on. This is incredibly authoritarian and pompous even. I never said I was against authority or even forms of authoritarianism but I am against the United State's forms. This is so normative, and so- again I don't know the word for it. Most people would call it fascist that's what I'm thinking, but I don't use that word, because it's not what fascism was about to me. It is so totalitarian and Orwellian. If a man is a violent murderer- or a woman is, or is guilty of a crime, they should be arrested and detained, in my view, and helped and confined perhaps, and punished even or penalized, but I dislike or loath the word corrections.

I decided, it's my role, it's my task- I don't want to necessarily but I need to understand power in the world and in society. I have a gift for smelling and finding fraud. Of course I'm limited in my ability when I don't understand the subject matter- e.g. accounting or law, but as I understand the subject matter, I'm above average from my peers who know an equal amount in detecting fraud or the potential therefore. I don't mean to brag. I just think this is so. No, I don't take any pride in this, or I shouldn't at least, but I should know my strengths and weaknesses. I feel it incumbent on me to understand the sources and forms of power in the world and the languages of these power structures. First of all we need personal power and independence that can only be won by work- not welfare! If you need it, fine, but only if you are giving 100 percent of your effort to get a job. I agree, many jobs today are inane and mind-numbing and I am thankful I don't have them. I wish for an earlier time, where we could all own our houses free and clear, and we worked in family or community businesses and industries, which we enjoyed and could take pride in. But I know this- if you don't suck it up and work hard, you won't get anywhere, and youth is the time to get at it, so you don't level out at a place and feel your life wasted. You must be not only true and accurate in your thinking (1+1=2) but also relevant (clouds are grey, so what!) (there is a real market for engineers, accountants, computer scientists. Those who know how will always have a job, those who know why will always be his or her boss). I now sort of believe and focus on functionalism- as I describe it. This is opposed to all forms of "cool" or "appearance" or whatnot, boasting. Can you do it? Are you useful? Of course it is necessary to some extent to be able to look the part- to get the job or even perhaps to perform the job. Actors and models rely perhaps 50+% percent on looks, but again that is a functional question. There is this form of personal power, called being able to work and perform tasks. We should not be graded solely on how well we perform but on our beauty as individual people and souls and spirits. We shouldn't be perhaps, but we will be, so deal with it. All the time wasted crying could be used learning.

I thought in the past I was learning so much. It turned out I was just going in circles and having presumptions confirmed to me. Now I finally am starting to learn, and I realize what a daunting task it is. It goes from memorization to understanding to application to analysis to evaluation and to creation according to one model. Most college level courses focus on the first three levels, and the masters degree courses perhaps on the last.

I just read a contract agreement between 3e and the US government. A company which did business with the Navy was not found guilty because it was not tried, but agreed to a settlement regarding overcharging on goods and services rendered, according to including excess costs in a cost-plus contract. It was cited in my cost accounting book, so i decided to look it up and read it. It was a treat to read.

I guess one graduates from the desire to be a rockstar or a movie star or astronaut to being happy and truly happy being in a business that provides decent real goods and services to the world- and provides opportunity to see the world. I am grateful. I really struggled with envy but I should envy myself. However, one thing is hard to kill. Not that I want to be a rockstar- I do, like Epica, or Metallica- they are awe-some. But it's the fact that the girls give themselves to them for nothing. Money for nothing and your chicks for free- right? Well I feel left out if I'm not one, but I'll work on righting this situation however it must be done. I just want to feel I've lived life you know. Tasted and enjoyed, what was put there for me to experience. I know I have to grow up and not be a child, whatever that means. How dumb it would be to dream and fantasize about the moon, or about playing star again, and living at your parents at age 35 all because you weren't modest? But these guys James Hetfield and Mark Jansen, who I really respect and admire- I know or I'm sure they work hard. Whatever it is we have to do as the task in front of us, I think if we work hard, we profit and prosper. Oh, the word profit replaced old english Gewinn. That was such a cool word.

There is something that governs us, governs our way and our needs. We all have so much potential but something governs it. it could be something within us, it could be moral zeitgeists or "society" or pressure from those around us, and others' expectations as well as our own and what we can extricate ourselves from, as well as the government itself and the IRD (the internal revenue Disservice). There is also something that governs governments and its agents.

I know it doens't cost money to enjoy life but it does require hard work. My friend is amazing. He filed for bankrupcy and he enjoyed himself and his life while he was going through all this. He didn't intend to get there, but he didn't let it bring him down. Also he is a hard worker, when he's working. I've seen him work hard. He's no shirker. When I have shirked in the past, for various reasons, I have only shirked on myself. I have only given bad customer service to my customer (employer) in which case I get no special bonus or opportunity, or bad customer service to my self, if I am my own customer. That is one reason why studying is harder than working- because in study, you have to be your own personal manager. That's what I find anyway. True study should- or at least the study I'm doing here, I'm finding that it not only fills my mind with information and knowledge, but it opens it wider to a bigger size, which opening is not easy and requires massive patience and adjustment. It's kind of like excavating and moving the earth.

Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes viking's post
Post Reply
Forum Jump: