my mom never wanted me and she said so
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25-09-2015, 07:18 AM
RE: my mom never wanted me and she said so
DNA is overrated. Just because you share some with a jerk doesn't make them less a jerk. I cut some ties and once you make that decision and act on it, it will feel as though the weight of the world is off your shoulders. Imagine your life without all the drama - looks pretty good, eh? And you can go out and make new friends without having to apologize for your idiotic relatives. Big Grin

We have enough youth. How about looking for the Fountain of Smart?
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25-09-2015, 09:14 AM
RE: my mom never wanted me and she said so
(25-09-2015 06:34 AM)Banjo Wrote:  
(25-09-2015 03:11 AM)purpledaisies Wrote:  Thank you everyone for the hugs. Ive been crying the last 2 days. Ive lost my whole family over night. The reason I say this is because first my sister shares a brain with my mom and second I've never had a good relationship with with my brother he is a hard core backwoods thinking Christian and theny other brother that we were close but after this idk. My grandma is dead and my aunts all live in other states.

I can say that even with my mil and her being religious she has been more of a mom to me then I've ever had. At least I have that but she too lives in another state.

I have one friend besides my husband that is there for me but she has a fibermyalogia (I don't know how to spell that) and she is not always there which I understand.

You have more than one friend. I know it is another context, but we are here.

I shall PM my skype and will listen. Let me know your name in the response so I do not block you. I keep getting contacts from young women I don't know and block them. I will always listen.

Thank you so much everyone. I mean that. Its just devastating to know you mother hates you and never wanted you. I know she blames me for every thing. I do know that when mom got married she claimed she had no idea she was pregnant and when dad found out he left her because he knee i wasn't his since she was 3 months along and they hadn't known each other that long. But he came back and I know they had it very rough for a while because she claimed she didn't know.Honestly I think she did and wanted to get married so no one would know and she felt she was stuck with dad. So I think that has a lot to with the way she treats me.

I do have a couple of friends at work that we are just work friends that read all the text and one of them looked at me and passed me a blunt and said you need to be high right now. Another said that was so cold I'm so sorry and that mom has no love me at all.

AndAnd I thought about sending a few text but honestly I'd have to send a huge back and forth for people to understand the magnitude of it all. I might talk to my aunt who has seen a little of it though.

I don't know I'm so hurt I even told her that she was twisting the knife in the deep cut she already gave me and nothing. I also told her that if it were one of my kids saying how they feel that I don't love them I'd be bending over backwards to let them know how much I love them. I also asked how could a mother say and do these things to their own child still nothing from her.

If you want I can post the textes but its a long back and forth and I'm not sure how to do it other than doing screen shots and posting like a picture. There will a lot of them.
I remember one time mom called me and wanted to meet for lunch and we were confirming the time when we got cut off so I thought. The next thing I knew dad was calling yelling at me for fighting with mom. I was so confused and I don't think he believed me.

I just don't understand how you can do this like that to your child. I have 2 and 3 step sons and I couldn't even do that to my step sons let alone own kids. And yes both my kids were surprises and so what I love them so much no matter what.
I did tell her that that was the difference between us that I could never do those things to my kids.

I just want to thank everyone.
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25-09-2015, 09:17 AM
RE: my mom never wanted me and she said so
You're a better person. Take some solace for that. People care. We're here. Hug

NOTE: Member, Tomasia uses this site to slander other individuals. He then later proclaims it a joke, but not in public.
I will call him a liar and a dog here and now.
Banjo.
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25-09-2015, 09:38 AM
RE: my mom never wanted me and she said so
I am really sorry you had to go through this. I can't help but think that your mother is just plain not a nice person or has some kind of personality disorder like maybe even borderline personality disorder (but then again I am no expert). Either way, this seems to result in recurring pain to you. I have not ever heard you actually mention anything positive or nice she has said to you and if this is the case, it seems it is time to cut the pain off and cut the lies off. It is hard, but why keep on going back to someone you can't trust? In the mean time, vent away and may your daisies be as beautiful as your personality and may you get the love you deserve.
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25-09-2015, 10:05 AM
RE: my mom never wanted me and she said so
(25-09-2015 09:38 AM)Iñigo Wrote:  I am really sorry you had to go through this. I can't help but think that your mother is just plain not a nice person or has some kind of personality disorder like maybe even borderline personality disorder (but then again I am no expert). Either way, this seems to result in recurring pain to you. I have not ever heard you actually mention anything positive or nice she has said to you and if this is the case, it seems it is time to cut the pain off and cut the lies off. It is hard, but why keep on going back to someone you can't trust? In the mean time, vent away and may your daisies be as beautiful as your personality and may you get the love you deserve.

Awe thanks that's so sweet. There have been a few rimes she was nice like once she bought me a new swim suit but it was taken back because dad said it was too skimpky and it set her off she returned it and I didn't get a new swim suit. There has been a few times she was nice when I was sick . I'm trying to think I might remember a few more. Oh one time she did take me to red lobster but that was right after I found about my dad so I'm not sure if that was her being nice or keeping up her image.
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25-09-2015, 10:52 AM
RE: my mom never wanted me and she said so
Unfortunately I can completely relate to this thread. I was the unwanted one, being the oldest sucked. My little sister got everything, I literally got leftovers. The image I always think about when I see my mom is when she punched me in the face and claimed I was the worst mistake she ever made.

It took a long time for me to come to grips with this as well as the years of neglect and emotional scars that were inflicted. However, there is light at the end of the tunnel. I surrounded myself with people who did love and care for me and fixed myself before I even began to worry about her problems. She is less hostile to me now than she was when I was a child. She also acknowledges that she should have handled things differently. We will probably never have the 'normal' mother and son relationship but I am ok with that. She has to live with her regrets not me. I have put it all behind me and I do care about her. However, the sting of growing up that way has really helped me raise my own kids in a loving and supportive environment.
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25-09-2015, 10:53 AM
RE: my mom never wanted me and she said so
(25-09-2015 10:52 AM)ohio_drg Wrote:  Unfortunately I can completely relate to this thread. I was the unwanted one, being the oldest sucked. My little sister got everything, I literally got leftovers. The image I always think about when I see my mom is when she punched me in the face and claimed I was the worst mistake she ever made.

It took a long time for me to come to grips with this as well as the years of neglect and emotional scars that were inflicted. However, there is light at the end of the tunnel. I surrounded myself with people who did love and care for me and fixed myself before I even began to worry about her problems. She is less hostile to me now than she was when I was a child. She also acknowledges that she should have handled things differently. We will probably never have the 'normal' mother and son relationship but I am ok with that. She has to live with her regrets not me. I have put it all behind me and I do care about her. However, the sting of growing up that way has really helped me raise my own kids in a loving and supportive environment.

Hug
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25-09-2015, 10:58 AM
RE: my mom never wanted me and she said so
(25-09-2015 01:34 AM)purpledaisies Wrote:  .... but my heart my hurts.

Hug





Something to help with the hurts.
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25-09-2015, 11:55 AM
RE: my mom never wanted me and she said so
I have to give my Momzilla credit for the fact that I learned from her what kind of parent not to be. Other than that she only caused pain, on several levels.

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

We're all mad here. The Cheshire Cat
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25-09-2015, 12:09 PM
RE: my mom never wanted me and she said so
This sounds so similar to my sister and her son. She got pregnant when she was 19 with my nephew and married the father who was, and is, a great guy. Just a wonderful man. But my sister resented being pregnant and a mother at such a young age and took it out on her son. She would lock him in his room when he was 2 and 3 years old while he would scream his lungs out. She didn't allow her mother in law and father in law to see him. One time calling the police when they came by for a visit. When her son was a baby she would leave him in his crib and go off to the store shopping. When my mother found out about it (I told her) she hit the ceiling. I never saw my mother so mad as she was with my sister leaving her son, my mother's grandson, in a crib while shopping.

When my nephew grew up there was always tension between the two. There would be no more children for my sister, she simply wasn't cut out for motherhood and the resentment over one child was enough for. She was absolutely terrified of getting pregnant again. The marriage between my sister and her husband was always rocky but it sort of went along.

When my nephew got married she simply hated the girl he married and said so. She hassled and picked at her daughter in law for all kinds of stuff. Mostly how they spent money. Sure, my nephew and his wife spent money like it was water but hey, that's their problem. It was a pot calling kettle situation though, my sister lived in a 1980's-90's MacMansion with all kinds of expensive furniture and doo-dads.

Anyway, when my nephew and his wife were looking for a house they asked my sister and her husband if she would help out with a loan. Well, all hell broke out. Yeah, it wasn't the best move on my nephews part because of the way they spent money but the way my sister handled the situation was beyond the pale. Anyway, she hasn't spoken to her son for about 12 years and finally divorced her husband.

I'm still friendly with my former brother in law, he's more like a brother to me. . I simply don't know how he put up with her for so long. It was very puzzling.

Aaaand she hasn't spoken to me for 8 years but that's another story altogether. I can tell you this much....it involves money.

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
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