my sister blasted me on fb
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28-09-2015, 02:00 PM
RE: my sister blasted me on fb
(28-09-2015 01:32 PM)Mathilda Wrote:  And the thing about abusive relationships is that the abuser is the one that needs the relationship. They just get the abused to think that they are the ones that need it.

I would bet anything that your mother will soon unblock you on facebook and show you her 'good side'. She'll leave it long enough to let you know your place, to learn your lesson and to make you worry that it was for good. That's how bullies work.

But if you were the one to block her and she thought you actually meant it, she'd be trying to worm her way back into your life and using all kinds of emotional blackmail. She is the one that needs you. Because without you she will have to take responsibility for her own life.

She has already blocked me but I'm done. My give a damn is busted and she stomped into dust. Now if someone blasts me on social media I'll set them straight like with my sister. Thats all I can do. I will never go back to that ever. Snd you are right she needs a punching bag and unfourntly I think she has started on him. Mainly because he said he tried t talk to her about me and now she refuses to talk to him blocked him from everything too.
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28-09-2015, 02:30 PM
RE: my sister blasted me on fb
(28-09-2015 01:21 PM)purpledaisies Wrote:  
(28-09-2015 01:17 PM)Imathinker Wrote:  You probably don't need people like that in your life...is this like an uber religious upbringing kinda deal? I have never heard an atheist be called mentally deficient, that is hateful.

No my mom needs help. She has always treated me like I ruined her life by getting pregnant before marriage by a man that was a fling. So she marriedy 'dad' and has resented me since. I think she thinks its all my fault that she had to marry and is stuck. I know its not my fault and I finally after 40 years called her out as I just couldn't take being her punching bag anymore.

Sooooo...your mom chose to have sex, chose the person with whom to have the fling, chose not to use protection, chose to carry the pregnancy to term, and chose to marry and stick with bio-dad and this is all somehow your fault even though you didn't even exist for most of those decisions? Dodgy

If she wants someone to blame, she should look in the mirror. Good for you for calling her out.

"I feel as though the camera is almost a kind of voyeur in Mr. Beans life, and you just watch this bizarre man going about his life in the way that he wants to."

-Rowan Atkinson
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28-09-2015, 02:41 PM
RE: my sister blasted me on fb
Block her, block your sister, and block anyone in the family who takes their side. Encourage your husband to block them, too. Give yourself a timeout from the relationship for six days, six weeks, six months, six years, whatever works for you.

Eventually, when she lies and is mean to you, it will still hurt, but a lot less than it does now.

You may want for your mother to say she's sorry, she was wrong, you were right, and she wants to be a good, supportive mom to you from now on. Know, though, that it's not likely that she can get to enough self-understanding and humility to say this. Even if she does try, she's still herself and is probably not going to be able to change into the kind of mom you want and deserve. The kind of effort that kind of change takes is tremendous; most people can't achieve it.
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28-09-2015, 02:55 PM
RE: my sister blasted me on fb
Damn that sucks PD. I'm really sorry you have to go through that. I don't know "WHY" they are treating you like that but it doesn't matter. I certainly hope the situation clears up for you. In the meantime, surround yourself with positive people that will still continue to challenge you but also support. Those are vital characteristics in relationships. If those types of characteristics aren't found in your family then shame on them. You deserve better.

**Crickets** -- God
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28-09-2015, 02:58 PM
RE: my sister blasted me on fb
(28-09-2015 02:30 PM)Can_of_Beans Wrote:  
(28-09-2015 01:21 PM)purpledaisies Wrote:  No my mom needs help. She has always treated me like I ruined her life by getting pregnant before marriage by a man that was a fling. So she marriedy 'dad' and has resented me since. I think she thinks its all my fault that she had to marry and is stuck. I know its not my fault and I finally after 40 years called her out as I just couldn't take being her punching bag anymore.

Sooooo...your mom chose to have sex, chose the person with whom to have the fling, chose not to use protection, chose to carry the pregnancy to term, and chose to marry and stick with bio-dad and this is all somehow your fault even though you didn't even exist for most of those decisions? Dodgy

If she wants someone to blame, she should look in the mirror. Good for you for calling her out.

Actually she didn't marry bio dad she lied to me about who my dad is til my aunt finally told me. Altgough I already strongly suspected but if u don't have it in black and white mom denies everything so had to get the thruth without her.

So she married a guy to make it look like she didn't have sex before marriage and feels like she was stuck with the guy whom she choose to pass me off as his kid.

But yep its all my fault.
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28-09-2015, 03:03 PM
RE: my sister blasted me on fb
(28-09-2015 02:41 PM)julep Wrote:  Block her, block your sister, and block anyone in the family who takes their side. Encourage your husband to block them, too. Give yourself a timeout from the relationship for six days, six weeks, six months, six years, whatever works for you.

Eventually, when she lies and is mean to you, it will still hurt, but a lot less than it does now.

You may want for your mother to say she's sorry, she was wrong, you were right, and she wants to be a good, supportive mom to you from now on. Know, though, that it's not likely that she can get to enough self-understanding and humility to say this. Even if she does try, she's still herself and is probably not going to be able to change into the kind of mom you want and deserve. The kind of effort that kind of change takes is tremendous; most people can't achieve it.

You are right that will never happen. But its OK I'm finally able to give myself the permission to say I'm done I've done everything I can possibly do.

But I have the one thing she can't dispute which is those texts she sent me. I screens shot them so that if anyone says anything I can clear it all up for them. I finally have something to show people I'm not a liar or mental.

I have cut her out I'm done. She will never apologize or even say I love you let alone anything else.

As I said my husband sent those text to my sister and u hope that she sees that I'm not the crazy one.
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28-09-2015, 03:31 PM
RE: my sister blasted me on fb
(28-09-2015 02:58 PM)purpledaisies Wrote:  
(28-09-2015 02:30 PM)Can_of_Beans Wrote:  Sooooo...your mom chose to have sex, chose the person with whom to have the fling, chose not to use protection, chose to carry the pregnancy to term, and chose to marry and stick with bio-dad and this is all somehow your fault even though you didn't even exist for most of those decisions? Dodgy

If she wants someone to blame, she should look in the mirror. Good for you for calling her out.

Actually she didn't marry bio dad she lied to me about who my dad is til my aunt finally told me. Altgough I already strongly suspected but if u don't have it in black and white mom denies everything so had to get the thruth without her.

So she married a guy to make it look like she didn't have sex before marriage and feels like she was stuck with the guy whom she choose to pass me off as his kid.

But yep its all my fault.

That's even worse. Did your "dad" know he's not your dad from the start or did she lie to him too?

"I feel as though the camera is almost a kind of voyeur in Mr. Beans life, and you just watch this bizarre man going about his life in the way that he wants to."

-Rowan Atkinson
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28-09-2015, 03:46 PM
RE: my sister blasted me on fb
(28-09-2015 01:02 PM)purpledaisies Wrote:  She said I was a lair and attention seeking. Then mom said I have mental issues and she was told to put me on meds when I was a kid. I never went to any kind of doctor for mental issues ever. In fact she has said many times that they didn't do things like that when I was a kid. Both my Mom and my sister blocked me. I didn't respond at all to that fb thread. But I was blocked anyway.

My husband sent my sister all those texts and she blocked him too. Said he was being an ass. But then said she was trying to figure it all out. I hope this will clear things up for my sister. If not I can't control her.

Im devastated to know I was never wanted then I'm being made to look mental on fb. And my dad refuses to lend us his trailer to move and refuses to talk to me. However mom text my husband to mail the truck payment that they bought from us instead of handing us a check like normal.

Its been a horrible week. Been crying do hard even at work. Which is when my brother called. He was so sweet to me and I'm glad he knows the truth.

Oh Purple, pull up a chair next to me. We could share crazy, hurtful sister stories. Sadcryface

I totally understand you pain. Damn.

Here's a giant hug for you.

[Image: 30-big-hug11.jpg]

Heart

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
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28-09-2015, 04:16 PM
i have now somehow edited her texts.
Up I sent those texts to my sister because she blasted me on Facebook and now mom says I edited her texts to make it look like she hates me and she never wanted me.

First how do u edit someone else's text that they send you? Second wow way to make it all about her agian. I can't even cut her out as she sent me another text that was way put of line.

I know I should block her on my phone but I'm trying to keep one thing open just in case even though I know it won't happen.

I just can't do this ........
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28-09-2015, 04:18 PM
RE: my sister blasted me on fb
(28-09-2015 01:13 PM)purpledaisies Wrote:  My mom hates me and said so. Even said she never wanted me and wished I was never born and i be been trouble since day 1.

:hugs:Heart

She can never choose your family but you can choose your friends.
I would block them any and every way you can and forget them.
The people who love you for who you are, are the ones that matter.

Don't try to use your brother to get to them. Like getting him to choose sides. That never ends well.
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