off topic...bro text argument over break up email
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14-01-2014, 05:04 PM (This post was last modified: 15-01-2014 09:52 AM by Adrianime.)
RE: off topic...bro text argument over break up email
OK, so this took like 4 hours to type up. But my bro texted me today and looks like he pretty much hates me now. You can read for yourself how it all went down, if you wish. I'M SORRY THIS IS TOO FREAKIN LONG TO COLOR CODE.

Oh and I was at work this whole conversation, so I missed reading many of his texts and many of my responses don't address everything that was said before.

There are a few more texts he sent tonight have to do with some facebook harassment that he is doing, but I'm not going to include those.

Some background knowledge, I'm from an abusive household and I have 6 older siblings and 1 younger sibling. I've never taken part in any of the numerous family squabbles that have been.
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D. So, are you ready to stop acting like a little girl?
D. It's funny because I've always been there fighting for you behind the scenes when noone else would and then you think you know so much more that you don't listen and sicount what im saying without any logic
D. Is be interested to see how you feel you know more about situations I have been in tens of times but you zero.
D. I hoped you would realize your bigger bro giving you super good advice. Sending your personal information out to everyone in a letter like that kills any chances you and [ex gf name] would have in the future. But who am I to know this? Oh, only your experienced older brother who has seen it and done it myself and seen the consequences. For some reason instead of acknowledging what I was saying whather you chose to follow or not you decided to discount it which is the girliest illogical choice. Anyway, this is gonna get resolved. Just cuz you wanna sit around thinking you know better doesn't mean its all good with me. I was already annoyed at you for letting others use you to get to me. Now I'm getting pissed. Time for us to settle up.
D. Time for you to act like my brother, not my sister.

A: Hey [Big Bro's name], you may be right about it ruining future chances with [ex gf name]. I am trying to make a clean break though and a new start. I wasn't trying to discount your advice, it was just a couple hours after my breakup and I felt like absolute crap and I did not want to text or talk on the phone to anybody about it. I told my friends the same thing that day (that I didn't want to talk about it unless it was in person). I appreciate your perspective.
What do you mean by people using me to get to you?

D. Like when [older sister's name] kept making comments directly after mine from months ago. Like when you have never really had a family and don't want one so you don't feeel you should say anything of people are talking shi* about me.

[[I tried to find these old posts, but couldn't. But if I remember right my bro was joking around calling me names (on a picture on facebook), and my aunt chimed in and complimented me (did not mention my bro). My bro took that to be an attack on him, and said something like, "oh no big bro D is being mean to A, better come save him" to my aunt, then my sister came in and complimented me as well. Then I said thanks for the compliments and that was that. Nobody ever directly addressed my bro D.]]

D. I don't want to feel let down or attacked by someone I have always supported and attacked others who would attack you.
D. All while we grew up I yelled at mom and dad and all our sisters when they left you out or talked shi* about you. Hard to see you isolate and act like you kbow better. That's what your sisters have done and why they are all in fu**ed up relationships.
D. People know you are my brother and that I love you because I stand up for you. I want the same.
D. If you were to advise me on something in your expertise( like girls are to me) then I would Atleast let you know I appreciate it. Not act like I'm being attacked because you told me I was or made a mistake.
D. That's what the girls all do. Avoid the logical topic and say they are being talked to meanly so they can't discuss. It's immature and I can't sit by and watch you do the same thing they do. I'm your big bro and I'm gonna tell you what o have to say even of its the last thong I do. It's up to you to be a good logical mental place to be a good brother.

A. I am sorry, but I don't let any of my siblings influence how I talk to or treat my other siblings. I care about you all and I am not going to get between any arguments or disagreements that any of you have. This has been how I have always done things. I don't mean to make it look like I'm not backing you up, I just cannot personally go the route of getting in the middle of you guys. The person I might stand up for is [little bro's name], because he is still a child and needs protection. But so far he hasn't needed it.

D. That's not ok and it is the way the family has fallen into this. How is it ok that I was fighting for you telling mom that [older sister's name] should not be able to dominate a house that the younger kids need as a sanctuary whole. [Older sister's name] tries to get you kicked out? Because it's wrong no matter who does it.
[[sidenote, my older sister had to move into my mom's place for a couple years because her house forcloseD. When I finished college I moved back home, and she was there also. According to my bro, she wanted to get me kicked out.]]
D. Until you stand for what is logical and what is right I guess me and you are gonna have some serious issues. I have fought for you whether you knew it or not your whole life and you can't even stand up for me when its blatent that you should have my back.
D. It's not getting between anything to stand for what is right and healthy. Just makes those who would've had your back leave.
D. I'm sick of you saying that you can't see or stand up for me or others who are being attacked indirectly when that's what exactly I have done for you.
D. How about I start treating you like you want to be treated. Not like family?? That's what you are saying to me. Sorry [Bro's name] even though they say fu**ed up things about you right infront of me I can't say anything....Not gonna fly anymore.
D. Sounds like you think you know better but all you do is make problems worse by not standing for your brother's at all times. The girls have shown they are idiots. If you want to act just like them you are gonna get treated like them.

A. All im saying is I want our relationship to be between you and me, not part of our disfunctional family fued, which I won't be part of.

D. Dude I couldn't feel more betrayed by you. I have taken asskickings from dad that were meant for you. I have taken insults and abuse from every sister defending you. and you say its too much to make it clear you have my back?
D. You are a part of it whether you want or not. That's what I'm saying here. You are serving others by ignoring the fu**ed up things they are and do to others like me.
D. You are right about one thing It is a family fued. I'm not gonna be ok with knowing you backstab me by saying nother.

A. I didn't even know you were having any conflicts with anybody besides [sister T who is 2 yrs older than me]. Nobody else has talked to me about you in years.

D. Especially when I have sacrificed for you many a time. I thought you knew this and respected me for it but you obviously need a history brush up. Don't bullshi* me. You have been there when [two oldest sister's names] have been trashing me. I heard from the others.
[[Side note: my oldest sister moved away from washington 3 YEARS AGO, and I've seen her once since.]]
D. Don't insult me by saying you didn't know the girls tried to gang up on me and say o was crazy in 2008.

A. 2008, 6 years ago when I was 19/20. I honestly know very little about anything that happened. I just know that everybody feels like they are the ones who are "right" and I'm not going to take sides or mediate. I just want to have a relationship with you all, I am not a pawn to use against each other.
[[I was away at college between 2006 and 2010]]

D. This is all pretty simple so quit trying to complicate it. If you don't want to show you have my back when a situation comes up that someone in our family is attacking me then its time I cut you loose. Why would I stand up for you over and over and get get told..." sorry I'm scared to get involved" ?
D. Wtf are you talking about? Of course people feel they are right. It makes you a bit** to say you don't want to be a pawn. Who asked you to? Stand up for what's right. Like when [older sister's name] wantes you kicked out o told mom that's bullshi*. It's easy and you are making excuses.
D. Calling it like it is would change the dynamics because they are banking on you keeping your mouth shut.
D. And you oblige because you are scared instead of handling your manly responsibilities and calling what is. Noone asking you to take any side except logic.

A. Don't stand up for me if it isn't what you want to do, I don't expect anybody else to solve my problems for me. I appreciate it when you help, but don't hold it against me. Just overall, please don't get me involved in any fights between siblings.

D. Oh I won't stand up for your bit**ass. Like I said if you want the same relationship you are giving me you got it!!
D. Who said anything about involving you. God. It's like talking to a little girl.
D. I said for you to stand up like a man for once. I am truly sorry for standing up for you for so long.
D. You don't know shi* about life, girls, money, or our family. You sit at the same job playing video games all day everyday AMD you wanna tell me whatsup?

A. You are asking for my participation, that is asking for my involvement. If you regret standing up for me, so be it. Do what you feel is right for you. I won't hold it against you.

D. All you do is what you are tolD. You don't pay your own bills, you don't do anything like a man but yet you want to tell me, someone who does all this,what's up?
D. You still use moms phones, you don't go out and meet people, and you let your sisters talk mad shi* about you AMD your brothers. You have one relationship after failing to secure any opportunity I gave you and you think you know about relationships?
D. Good, what's right for me is to treat you how you treat me. I hope you can handle that.
D. We will see right away.

A. Where do you get the idea i don't pay for my own bills? Or that I have ever done what I was told?

D. You are a child, and I don't respect you for this attitude.
D. Mom pays your phone bill you little bit**.
D. And for your school she paid, you haven't done shi* but play video games for years.
[[for the record, I do play games as a hobby, but he actually has no idea what I do with my life. I see him only a few times a year, and never talk to him about games.]]
D. You even got your job from [brother in law's name]. Your a bit**.
D. I took the time to teach your bit**ass to drive and make sure you got a good vehicle. O should've told you to act like a man and do it yourself.
[[we drove 2 times max, for a total of 45 minutes or so. Although he did help me choose my prius (not the specific car, but the model)]].
D. I just operated under the assumption you were intelligent and would appreciate the things I have done AMD reciprocate it
D. Now, I'm just gonna tell everyone what's with you instead of defending you.
D. I'm actually ashamed of you that you have taken this attitude. So you go ahead and think its ok. I guess we were never friends and just barely brothers and only by my actions
D. But don't think me or anyone who stands for what is logical will be all good with you anymore.

A. Why does it matter how I got my first job? If I had gotten it from you would it have been different? And yeah mom pays 10 dollars a month to have me on her plan, so? Why hold it against me that mom payed for my college? For 4 years I've been working at my career and paying for everything myself (aside from the phone). If mom ever asked me to get my own phone line I would.

D. It matters becayse you act like a boy but want to be called a man. Unrespectable from someone who does it all by myself.

A. I see, well I am fine with being called a boy, or a chilD. I'm extremely happy with my life, so what people say about me really doesn't bug me. everybody looks at things differently.

D. Well this is your older brother. You should be ashamed and I will hold you accountable. Obviously we can't be friends.

A. I believe we can.

D. Whatever, you don't care about me enough to make it clear you have my back as I have continually done for you. This doesn't involve starting fights with people like you keep insinuating. It's showing you won't stand for me being disrespected in any situation. I don't respect that or the fact that you think you know more about things I am obviously more experienced in. You will see very fast how life is when someone who always advocated for you changed. I'll make sure I let everyone know what's up with you. I'm dissapointed because unlike our sisters I have always tried to create a real love and bond with you and [little bros name]. You have said and shown you don't care oor want that just like the girls. You are making a huge mustake but its the same one you watched your sisters make and now choose to make. That shows what a loser you are. That's fine, I'll defriend you off facebook layer this evening and letting everyone know what a bi**ass know it all backstabber you are. You want to be a fu**ing idiot, your choice kid.

A. I don't want you to push me away, but I cannot tell you what to do. I won't defriend you or shut you out. I'll accept you for who you are man. always.

D. Because who I am doesn't disrespect or screw you over in the past. Not tire starting now so that would work for you of course. Who you are disrespects me and screws me over by your choice. Time to treat you how you treat me.
D. When you learn to take some responsu for YOUR actions let me know. Until then you are a du**ing little bubblebit** who I can't respect.

A. I think you have disrespected me a whole bunch. But that doesn't mean I won't accept you.

D. Like I said before, I guess I only really ever had one brother. You were just like my sisters screwing me over and you shown it.

A. If that is how you feel, I obviously can't change that.

D. You did the worst thing you can do to a brother. Discount and disrespect the brother who has always been there for you because you think you know better. You don't know shi* and I will make sure everyone knows so that my ass is covered.
D. You could if you didn't act like your sisters instead of a man.

A. I act like Adrian. That's all.

D. You act like a Brother backstabbing little bit**. Now live with that you little shi*. I am a man, you are a little illogical bit**. You are just like your dumbass sisters who trash you behind your back. Good luck being an idiot.

A. I never backstabbed you, nor have I ever done anything to try to harm you.

D. You have done nothing in your life bit what you are told. You are a pathetic little shi* and honestly you are gonna see really fast why you don't fu** you brothers over.
D. Yes you have and continuously . You have stabbed me in the back over and over. I'm done with your stupid ass.
D. I give you example after example and you just deny and refuse responsibility. That's why this just get more serious.

A. You consider me telling you I will not be part of any family disagreements as backstabbing? When that is my own personal boundary that I have always made clear?

D. I'm done explaining to you you little bit**. Most normal brothers wouldn't defend screwing their brother over by letting others talk shi* about them in front of others. But you do. Fu** you.
D. just hope you don't see or talk to me until you frow the fu** up. You are officially uninvited to all family events at my place you little backstabber.
D. I am a man and a good brother and all I asked was for the same in return. Your a little bit**
D. Boundaries?? Lol, called failing and running like a coward and lieing to yourself. But that why you never had many friends like your sisters Bit**ass attitude thinking you are above when you are below.
[[He does not know much about me, sadly. I've always had a good core group of friends, and still do. I just don't do the whole acquaintances thing, I prefer to actually be really close with people.]]

D. Socially retarded
D. Dishonest as hell bit noone to gold you accountable. Congrats on modeling perfect after them.

A. I don't think I have been dishonest, what have I done that is dishonest?

D. Ignore the truth and maintain what is hurting the whole family just for one.
D. To say that this is boundaries for two.
D. This is bit**ing out not boundaries. Everything you just said is dishonest just like your sisters.
D. You don't address anything just make up excuses. Sooo dishonest.

A. I really don't understand what is happening here. I haven't seen any new conflict between you and our sisters in years (except for [sister's name who is 2 years older than me]), and I never talk to them about you. You are acting like they sit around takling crap about you to me which doesn't happen..

D. I have sacrificed a lot for you that you don't either understand or acknowledge f
D. You too scares to be honest with your dad. You rather lie to him than tell him the truth. You just dishonest so that your little child life can continue. I got new buddy, you just got the attention on you since you think it ok to let others trash me
D. You scared and dishonest to everyone.

A. I'll say it again, people don't sit around trashing you. I don't know what you are imagining but you say far far more negative things about our sisters than they say about you (in my presence) because they don't talk to me about you at all. I don't flip out every time you have a negative opinion about them, because that is your issue with them, and im not trying to intervene.

D. LMAO. Dude I know for a fact you have been sitting there as they talked trash. Don't even try to lie.
D. Just because they didn't say it to you directly. You are so dishonest in that way. You are arguing semantic like a bit**.

A. That isn't even possible. I see each of my siblings probably less than 5 times a year. Even when [older sister's name] was living in moms house we never talked. I don't casually talk to any of them.

D. It's funny you even think you have a point little boy. You don't. You sound like a little teenager and that's why your life is so pathetic. I thought at some point you would man up. I'm sick of your bit**ass arguing tiny details that aren't the point. It is exactly my point. Instead of making things right with me you'd rather fight me on bit**ass unrespectable backstabb.
D. I hope it's worth it to you.
D. You go from person to person not realizing there is a common good and you lie to each to make things ok with them so you can feel out of the conflict AMD all you do is fan the flames. Mom finally is undertanding this, and I'm surprised you maintain it when its failed in front of you.
D. Your a coward
D. You don't do the things that others do for you AMD that makes you a coward. I ain't cool with. Period.
D. Fact is, you already told me all you care about is yourself. Fu** that and Fu** you
D. And don't worry, like I said, I will spread the word for you that you only care about your videogames but not your family and especially your older bro who has always been there for you especially when you didn't even know it but needed it most. Way before [older sister's name] said anything to dad at your graduation I said things to mom AMD dad about how they abused us all and especially the boys. You AMD [little brother's name] got the benefits of me standing up for you.

A. You aren't listening to a single thing I say. From my point of view you are making crap up and then calling me names blaming me for crap that either didn't happen, or happened so many years ago that it is irrelevant. I'm telling you right now, I have not heard [my four oldest sister's names] talk about you more than once or twice in years. Ask [little bro's name] since you obviously trust him more than me. he is usually at the same gatherings that Im at.
[[while I was typing this, he sent 3 or 4 of the texts sent above, so this isn't actually addressing those things, or at least it wasn't supposed to]]

D. Now you think you have things worked out for yourself and its a house of cards waiting to come down on yA. Next you will need anti depressants and anti anxiety medicine like all your sisters.

A. Hah and im sorry to say, but my life is awesome dude. I see the crap that everybody goes through and im not. You can wish me to be miserable all you want but i am doing pretty damn good.

D. You love to focus on everything except the point. It's ok, its what I would expect. Go and beleive your life is awesome LMAO.
D. You are the only person I know who would classify your little shell of a life awesome LMAO.
D. Must be awesome because you live in a videogame like a loser instead of going out and living.
D. I never siad I want you to be miserable. I said its obvious your life sucks.
D. You just keep livin in la la land and I'll expose you for the selfish little backstabbing bit** you are.
D. This is the dumbest thing I have ever seen you do.
D. You live like a kid with everyone doing everything for you but think you are smart LMAO. That's just like your older sisters. Mom AMD dad paid for everything for them too bit yet they maintain they did it independant.

A. Haha my life doesn't suck man. You are being extremely judmental telling another person that their life sucks. Just because i have different interests than you doesn't mean i cant be happy. not that you even know what i do with most of my time.

D. And as I read that you say I'm making up crap I am amazed you don't recall that as I watched you lie to dad over and over about just visiting him over last few years instead of just being honest at any point.
[[My big bro hasn't talked to my dad in like 3 years]]
D. Everything that contributes to this situation whether it was Years ago or now is part your doing for being dishonest from person to person.

A. What did I lie to dad about? And even if I did lie to dad, of course I'm inclined to lie to the person I spent most of my life terrified of.

D. Why are you concentrating on whether your life sucks. My god you are too easy. I could verbally blow you away right now due to your stupidity AMD lack of ability to address anything directly about what I've said except what you feel is am insult. Lol
D. Dude you sit AMD do nothuiing in your life, in our family. All you do is sit.
D. It's pathetic because then you think you can tell me, someone who has and is experienced in real life what is??
D. Of course you want to make it about that. It's the blueprint by your socially retarded sisters.
D. I have always been accepting of you when I thought you cared about me. Now its on. Your life is a disgrace. You are 26 and act and live like you are 14?

A. ? tell me something I've lied about. Both to you and to dad. Don't dodge the question.

D. OK you told Dad numerous times you couldn't come over and then told me you lied to him about it because you didn't want to go. Are you serious that you think I can't site your dishonesty?? It's the same with each person.
D. You lied to me when you said noone of the sisters talked shi* in front of you.
D. Where's your response to that? Where's your stupid comeback?

A. Yes, I often made excuses for not seeing dad. But when I told u that the sisters have not talked about you with me in recent history that was not a lie.
A. And don't act like you don't understand me not wanting to see dad.

D. Dude you are such a liar. Can't you see how you are embodying a dishonest person? You have so many dishonest excuses. You lie to your own dad over and over rather than just talk with him. No I don't understand that because I was honest with him.
D. You fu**ing bit** I NEVER said recent history about them shi*talking. Both cases of you lieing I just popped on you and you can't even admit it.

A. Well, then you were a stronger person than I was back when I lied to dad. It took me a long time to overcome my fear of him.

D. So why lie to me and say you never lied to dad. Yes, being honest takes strength. Getting my ass kicked for you took strength. But I did what was right.

A. But alright, here is the question then. Do you think I am dishonest? If so there is no point in continuing to talk if you won't even consider what I'm saying.

D. Yeah I think your dishonest, and a bit**ass cowarD. Lol you just admitted you lied about just the first two things you wanted clarity on.
D. Your little game is over. Your attitude is what is screwing your own family over and I won't allow it.
D. Your dishonest and irresponsible just like your bit** sisters. Things will get a lot worse for you than better since you dug yourself in a dishonest hole but what would I know right?
D. Rereading this text is funny. You deny deny, then try to change subject, then deny deny some more. Since you're this fu**ing stupid just so you know, all you had to do was give my words some credit. But you thought you would tell me how it is lol.
D. You can't even be honest with anyone in your family. Then you challenge people to prove you are lying and when they prove it you say" well if I'm dishonest I guess that's all" LMAO that's textbook your sisters and coward.
D. All you had to do was take some responsibility but you would rather tell me you are honest when you lie. It is lieing and super dishonest to go from person to person in this family only spending time around those who will let you lie to them. In the future try listening to what people who have been where you have been. It will help you out more than listening to people who are not like you like your sisters
D. The thing you just can't seem to process is I have listened to EVERYTHING you have said and its all "poor Adrian" You have succeeded in learning the most unrespected thing by guys. Playing the victim role like a coward instead of addressing the issue and solving it.
D. That's why you don't have shi* except what your mommy and daddy and loser [bro in law's name] gave you. Go ahead and think its tight to stand for your own bloods demise. You said you don't care about the family. That was your quote. "I don't care about this family, I've never really had a family and don't really want one". That's what you said to me.
[[not sure when/if I said this, although I did think this way when I was a teenager]]
D. Well in this world you are held to your standard and I'll make sure your position is known as well as mine.
D. You would rather talk lies and nonsense to me rather than listen to knowledge earned. You would rather lie to people in your family than directly talk honestly. This you have said and shown over and over I got no respect for that or you anymore since this is your position.
D. You don't even have the balls to call you gotta lie over text. Ok that's it, its on.
D. Oh man reading how stupid yyou are be rereading this just confirms how bad you need a dose of reality.
D. There is every point if you say something unlike your string of denying responsibility because it would be honest.

A. Sorry had a work emergency. but like i said, if you think i am dishonest there is no point in my trying to talk to you. Hope you have a good night [big bro's name]

D. Lol, ok [big sister's name]

A. This be Adrian, yo

D. So your only option is to bit**out like your sisters it's what you use a coping mechanism. It's pathetic and unrespectable.
D. I know who is is o texted you
D. You can't even by man enough to resolve a problem you started with your big bro. That's the most bit**ass thing of all.

A. My only option is to be honest with you man. If you can't accept that its on you.

D. When have you been honest? Another flat out lie. You keep lying and I won't accept it.
D. I can't believe you just said your only option is to be honest after lying to me for our whole conversation.

A. Hah exactly. If you can't accept my words as true there is no point in talking.

D. Answer your phone bit**!
D. Ok I'll just kick your ass. No prob

A. Haha and hell no am I talking to somebody who just spent a whole day insulting me. Have a goodnight brother.

D. When I see you next its on bit**.
D. Ok I guess I'm coming over there to do it.
D. You are a complete moron and a bit** Adrian
D. Just get a sexchange now.
D. Of course you are scared. Just like the reason you lie to us all. You obviously don't know what being held accountable is but your Bout to.
D. LMAO you are so pathetic. We ain't bros and you about to get served.
D. Don't call me brother ever again.

I prefer fantasy, but I have to live in reality.
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15-01-2014, 08:41 AM
RE: off topic...bro text argument over break up email
Well, he defriended me on facebook, and stalked my comment I made on my aunts page and started a fight with me on her facebook wall. Essentially he insulted me, so I said ,"I know I am awesome, you don't have to tell me." So then he called me dishonest and a loser with no life who gets everything from mom and dad...then claims I made a quote about not wanting a family and not having a family a year ago.

I have yet to insult him once (I think?). But he takes everything I say and makes it an attack on him.

Honestly I'm not too worried about anything he might say on facebook though. I've tried to live a pretty regret-free life, so I don't think there is much about me that he knows about that I find shameful. Unfortunately, I think he is making himself look like an idiot, and he will probably end up isolating himself even more.

If he returned to normal and would just talk to me instead of attacking me, I'd be fine. But I don't see that happening any time soon.

I prefer fantasy, but I have to live in reality.
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15-01-2014, 09:05 AM
RE: off topic...bro text argument over break up email
I always advise people to make piece with family, but in your case I would tell him to read all the shit he said and fuck off out of your life until he understands what an asshole he is being.

Theism is to believe what other people claim, Atheism is to ask "why should I".
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15-01-2014, 09:11 AM
RE: off topic...bro text argument over break up email
Just because someone is blood doesn't mean they are good for you.

I'll give you my mother's address, send your brother there and the two of them can miserable each other to death. Oh, the fun they will have sitting around talking shit about family members and blaming everyone else for any real or perceived issues.

See here they are, the bruises, some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF
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15-01-2014, 09:13 AM
RE: off topic...bro text argument over break up email
(15-01-2014 08:41 AM)Adrianime Wrote:  , I think he is making himself look like an idiot, and he will probably end up isolating himself even more.

I agree.

Quote:If he returned to normal and would just talk to me instead of attacking me, I'd be fine. But I don't see that happening any time soon.

I don't see it happening either. He needs help. He's got all sorts of issues going on.


good luck with that.


Be excellent to each other and party on, Dudes!
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15-01-2014, 09:35 AM
RE: off topic...bro text argument over break up email
(15-01-2014 08:41 AM)Adrianime Wrote:  Well, he defriended me on facebook, and stalked my comment I made on my aunts page and started a fight with me on her facebook wall. Essentially he insulted me, so I said ,"I know I am awesome, you don't have to tell me." So then he called me dishonest and a loser with no life who gets everything from mom and dad...then claims I made a quote about not wanting a family and not having a family a year ago.

I have yet to insult him once (I think?). But he takes everything I say and makes it an attack on him.

Honestly I'm not too worried about anything he might say on facebook though. I've tried to live a pretty regret-free life, so I don't think there is much about me that he knows about that I find shameful. Unfortunately, I think he is making himself look like an idiot, and he will probably end up isolating himself even more.

If he returned to normal and would just talk to me instead of attacking me, I'd be fine. But I don't see that happening any time soon.

I stand by what I told you yesterday in the shoutbox. You are better off without that kind of person in your life.

(31-07-2014 04:37 PM)Luminon Wrote:  America is full of guns, but they're useless, because nobody has the courage to shoot an IRS agent in self-defense
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15-01-2014, 09:46 AM
RE: off topic...bro text argument over break up email
I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say --- Printing out a conversation you had with your brother to get opinions from others is a sign that you could use some therapy to deal with family issues.
Therapy can help you deal with this sort of family trauma. Not that we don't care - we do. But get Real help so the rest of your life gets easier. Families can screw you Up, hon. They really can.

Don't watch for your brother to change. You just take care of yourself. (hug)

When I want your opinion I'll read your entrails.
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15-01-2014, 11:49 AM (This post was last modified: 15-01-2014 12:01 PM by Adrianime.)
RE: off topic...bro text argument over break up email
(15-01-2014 09:05 AM)sporehux Wrote:  I always advise people to make piece with family, but in your case I would tell him to read all the shit he said and fuck off out of your life until he understands what an asshole he is being.
Thanks for reading man. I honestly don't think he thinks he has done anything wrong. By the end of the conversation I was feeling sassy (you know that mood you get when you talk to some person on a forum and they just start insulting you and saying stuff that hardly makes sense and all you can do is laugh about it).

(15-01-2014 09:11 AM)Anjele Wrote:  Just because someone is blood doesn't mean they are good for you.

I'll give you my mother's address, send your brother there and the two of them can miserable each other to death. Oh, the fun they will have sitting around talking shit about family members and blaming everyone else for any real or perceived issues.
Hah, I mean, I get an impulse for retaliation that's for certain, but I don't want anything bad for him overall. I just hope, for his own sake, that he chills the eff out. Thanks for reading AnJe! I don't know if I've given up on our relationship or not. I just know I'm not going to bend to his will if it goes against my comfort and/or values.

(15-01-2014 09:13 AM)Bows and Arrows Wrote:  
(15-01-2014 08:41 AM)Adrianime Wrote:  , I think he is making himself look like an idiot, and he will probably end up isolating himself even more.

I agree.

Quote:If he returned to normal and would just talk to me instead of attacking me, I'd be fine. But I don't see that happening any time soon.

I don't see it happening either. He needs help. He's got all sorts of issues going on.

good luck with that.
Thanks Bows. Good luck with the 30 day plank challenge!! We got this.
(15-01-2014 09:35 AM)Revenant77x Wrote:  I stand by what I told you yesterday in the shoutbox. You are better off without that kind of person in your life.
Yeah I really appreciated our chat yesterday, thanks man. For now I'm honestly more focused on my self improvement than this drama. This drama is just background noise right now. It just happened to take up ALL of yesterday.

(15-01-2014 09:46 AM)WitchSabrina Wrote:  I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say --- Printing out a conversation you had with your brother to get opinions from others is a sign that you could use some therapy to deal with family issues.
Therapy can help you deal with this sort of family trauma. Not that we don't care - we do. But get Real help so the rest of your life gets easier. Families can screw you Up, hon. They really can.

Don't watch for your brother to change. You just take care of yourself. (hug)
Thanks Sabrina. Although, I share this for a few reasons.
--because of my semi-anonymity on this site
--Sharing this with you guys will more than likely not impact my brother in a negative way (I don't share it with RL friends and fam because I don't want them to hate him for this...although it's getting pretty damn tempting I'll tell you).
--Having a place to vent is therapeutic
--hearing other perspectives is really nice, and comforting.
--it gives me a place to go and reread and reflect on the situation.

I appreciate your suggestion though, I just don't feel it is necessary for me. Thanks for reading!

I prefer fantasy, but I have to live in reality.
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15-01-2014, 12:07 PM
RE: off topic...bro text argument over break up email
He texted me a one word text at 9:00 today, "Coward" *sigh*. I am undecided on whether I should be worried about his physical threats (at the very end of our convo). I don't think he is stupid enough to actually attack me, but I also know that he has had problems in the past (a non-sibling fam member has pulled his public records and he has a bunch of orders against him, I don't know the details though.).
I don't imagine being beat up would be that bad...I don't think I'd fight back. Not because I don't believe in fighting (which I don't usually, unless it is necessary), it just seems like raising a fist against him would ruin our relationship for life.

Que sera sera.

I prefer fantasy, but I have to live in reality.
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15-01-2014, 12:15 PM
RE: off topic...bro text argument over break up email
a physical altercation is never a good choice with family members.

He has multitudes of issues but it sounded to me that (his version) he spent much of your childhood sticking up for you and that was his way of showing his love for you.

Maybe if you just send a short acknowledgement of that he will back off and maybe chill out. It sounds like he wants credit for doing something good and you are denying him that.

Maybe something along the lines of "i've been thinking about what you said, and just want to say thank you for those times you stuck up for me in the past, I appreciate it."

and then just leave it at that. walk away, tell him you are busy at work and can't talk or text.

Then when you pick up the conversation in a few days explain that he doesn't need to do that for you any more. a thanks but no thanks I will deal with my own problems.

just a thought.


Be excellent to each other and party on, Dudes!
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