venting about my fight with my sister
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03-11-2014, 07:05 PM
venting about my fight with my sister
Oh my fucking god. I just had an argument with my 19 year old little sister. That girl is impossible to communicate with.

Let me give you a brief history on my sister. She has a lying problem. She has lied enough to where she almost had my parents thrown in jail and had my adopted brothers put back into foster care. She’s fucked with the whole families emotions and used to pit us against each other. At least now we know she has this problem, so we’ve begun to mend our relationships.

My sister is a Christian, and today she started talking to me about her husband watching porn. She got married at 17. Obviously, she’s against it and wants him to stop. We’ve talked about this a ton of times before, she knows where I stand on the issue but she wants to take what I say and twist it around to my mom and other sister. She’s done that plenty of times before. My stance on porn is simple. Treat porn like anything that has the ability to be addicting: use in moderation. Porn should not be distracting you from a social life or a real relationship. People who use porn has got to understand the fantasy aspect of it, it’s not real. I’ve gone through a lot of “soul searching” to become secure enough in myself. I’m not perfect, I have my insecurities. But honestly I’m more confident in myself than I’ve ever been. I have come a long way and I know that if my husband wants to look at porn, it’s not because I’m not gorgeous! (Because, duh, of course I am Kiss )

Anyway, she KNOWS I have different views! I don’t know what she was expecting from me. My husband is a man. And quite frankly, monogamy is hard! We've gotta spice things up once in a while!

Maybe I should’ve just kept my mouth shut and listened, and I admitted that in the conversation. It’s just that she was judging me and Joe and our marriage pretty harshly. She talked to me like I was weak because I "let" Joe watch porn. She said that my husband and I are cheating on each other when we look at porn. She told me that eventually Joe is going to get bored and he’s going to want more. I’m sorry, but how will he not want more if he wasn't looking at porn? She was telling me the dangers of porn as if I don’t know. Like I said, I was very insecure about porn at one point, and I read a ton of articles about the risks of porn. Joe and I have come to a conclusion about how porn should be used based on our research and experience with it.

She called me a bitch and a bad sister. She blatantly told me I’m stupid. She told me that my views (atheism) are crazy and stupid. When my sister argues, she argues about EVERYTHING!

At the end of the conversation she said she just wanted someone to listen and that’s why she wanted to talk to me in the first place. I told her she was right, I should just listen, and that I’m just dealing with some trust issues with her because of her twisting things I say to my mom and other sister. She got mad and told me to leave. I tried to reason with her, but she insisted I leave.

Thanks for reading. I just had to vent. Rolleyes

"Most people are other people.
Their thoughts are someone else's opinions,
their lives a mimicry,
their passions a quotation."
-Oscar Wilde
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05-11-2014, 07:25 AM
RE: venting about my fight with my sister
So.. what kind of porn are you into?
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05-11-2014, 07:37 AM
RE: venting about my fight with my sister
(05-11-2014 07:25 AM)godnads Wrote:  So.. what kind of porn are you into?

Lol I had a feeling people would only read the word "porn" on this thread. I'm not quite as into it as my husband is. The porn industry is definitely geared more towards men. The stuff I watch is pretty tame comparatively. I want everyone in the porno to be attractive. I don't want to watch a dirty old man fucking a sexy 18 year old girl. Lol

"Most people are other people.
Their thoughts are someone else's opinions,
their lives a mimicry,
their passions a quotation."
-Oscar Wilde
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05-11-2014, 07:38 AM
RE: venting about my fight with my sister
Your sister's gonna end up divorced. No

Atheism is the only way to truly be free from sin.
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05-11-2014, 07:46 AM
RE: venting about my fight with my sister
(05-11-2014 07:38 AM)Colourcraze Wrote:  Your sister's gonna end up divorced. No

I'm afraid of that too. She has too much of a princess fantasy in mind for her marriage.

"Most people are other people.
Their thoughts are someone else's opinions,
their lives a mimicry,
their passions a quotation."
-Oscar Wilde
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05-11-2014, 11:47 AM
RE: venting about my fight with my sister
If your sister knew you beliefs ahead of time, why did she choose you to vent to? It makes no sense unless she wanted to start a fight. If I knew someone totally disagreed with me on a subject, that is not the person I would choose to complain to about the subject. It just seems odd to me.

I am still learning. --Michelangelo, age 87
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05-11-2014, 01:54 PM
RE: venting about my fight with my sister
(05-11-2014 11:47 AM)ComradeBunny Wrote:  If your sister knew you beliefs ahead of time, why did she choose you to vent to? It makes no sense unless she wanted to start a fight. If I knew someone totally disagreed with me on a subject, that is not the person I would choose to complain to about the subject. It just seems odd to me.

That's exactly what I thought too. I've theorized about it, but I really just don't know. She may have been looking for someone to tell her she's right. I think she's insecure about not being able to control her husband. Maybe when I didn't "side" with her, she got defensive.

"Most people are other people.
Their thoughts are someone else's opinions,
their lives a mimicry,
their passions a quotation."
-Oscar Wilde
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05-11-2014, 02:33 PM
RE: venting about my fight with my sister
(05-11-2014 01:54 PM)LadyWallFlower Wrote:  
(05-11-2014 11:47 AM)ComradeBunny Wrote:  If your sister knew you beliefs ahead of time, why did she choose you to vent to? It makes no sense unless she wanted to start a fight. If I knew someone totally disagreed with me on a subject, that is not the person I would choose to complain to about the subject. It just seems odd to me.

That's exactly what I thought too. I've theorized about it, but I really just don't know. She may have been looking for someone to tell her she's right. I think she's insecure about not being able to control her husband. Maybe when I didn't "side" with her, she got defensive.

A man looking at porn is like a man masturbating. It's just something they do, like breathing.

I've been married 25 years and my husband looks at porn and did even when we were engaged. Doesn't bother me in the least. If your sister is all in a twist over her husband looking at porn then she's in for a very difficult marriage.

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
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05-11-2014, 02:40 PM
RE: venting about my fight with my sister
oh sweetie....porn is just the tip of the iceberg, loads of fun out there if you are adventurous. Cool

As long as you and your husband are on the same page, its no one else business and there isnt a right or wrong, enjoy life.

Maybe sister is worried God will see her expressing herself in ways she only fantasizes about ?


"Life is a daring adventure or it is nothing"--Helen Keller
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05-11-2014, 02:44 PM
Re: venting about my fight with my sister
I have a female friend who keeps her Internet connection going so her husband can watch porn. In her words, doesn't matter how he gets going, but he always ends up in the same bedroom.
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