what's the difference between supporting someones rights and....
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05-10-2012, 12:26 AM
what's the difference between supporting someones rights and....
polity being a bigot. I ask because i know one person that rides that line monthly. he is my dad and bui I wish I could go up to him and say.... "hay dad I am a pansexual and transgender." and I would survive maybe to seconds. not because he would attack me but he would kick me out. my dad is the kind of person who believes that the whole gay rights issue is about religious rights and that's where he would be wrong. {I'm a bit of subject here. so let me get to my main point.} my dad says he supports my right to do anything. just as long as....

a. he dosen't have to support it with his money or in his house.{he some how thinks that if I put on nail polish in his house and he lets me live here. by proxy he so supporting ungodly. so I can't do anything of the sort.}
b. he dosen't have to vote for my rights{he never says this but I just know it}

and some of that is true. he can set the rules of the house he owns as he wants and he dosen't have to vote for anything he dosen't like regardless of any objections buttt.. that leaves me no escape. no room to be me and express myself. mainly i can move when I get into hud housing but that will take a while.

the thing is he seems to be more than just oppositional. he thinks that the gay rights movement is there to divide america and he thinks the same about atheism though he supports anyone rights to freely follow them but that's it right there it's that exact loop think that makes no since. he seems to be walking north and south at once and I didn't like it. when I am any form him I want to see him but when I am around him I want him gone. sorry I am babbling but i leave it at this.

what's the difference between supporting someones rights and polity being a bigot

1. Striding and swaggering rootlessness without end. The precious flow of life.
2. one should fear sweet a blood stained flower.
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05-10-2012, 02:06 AM (This post was last modified: 05-10-2012 02:23 AM by PoolBoyG.)
RE: what's the difference between supporting someones rights and....
1. The ignorant and hateful have the right to say (generally) whatever they like. Unfortunately, that includes creating an atmosphere of misinformation and hate, donating to hateful organizations, and voting for hateful people/parties. (Hopefully, this means towards hate and ignorance will be revised one day.)

2. You also have the right to confront him, and vote, and donate in the way you like.


Your real issue is... weighing your possible abuse and hardships. Do you confront him and become homeless, or do you stay quiet and suffer some mental anguish?

Now, decide which one of those will be the most harmful to you, and choose the opposite. Fairly straight forward. Now, while you choose the lesser of two evils, by all means, find other alternatives to your predicament. Do what you can to make your life better, not just for right now, but for the future as well.

You're not obligated to change people at the expense to yourself. If you can secure your own well being and happiness, then you can try to help your dad to not be so ignorant and hateful. But again, if the cost to yourself of doing so is too great, don't.
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05-10-2012, 02:31 AM
RE: what's the difference between supporting someones rights and....
thanx!!!!

1. Striding and swaggering rootlessness without end. The precious flow of life.
2. one should fear sweet a blood stained flower.
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05-10-2012, 07:49 AM
RE: what's the difference between supporting someones rights and....
meh..

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05-10-2012, 08:28 AM
RE: what's the difference between supporting someones rights and....
Why are you waiting for HUD?

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05-10-2012, 09:18 AM
RE: what's the difference between supporting someones rights and....
I think poolboyg88 has some good advice there. It seems to me that if it's at all possible for you to get on your own feet that probably gives you the best chance at a happier life. Unless the hardship that you endure at home is exceptionally great, it may be that your best option is to deal with it until you can move out on your own. Sad

This is the same advice that has been given for people coming out as atheists to religious parents, when being kicked out is a risk. But it seems like it's got to be much more difficult for someone to live as a gender they appear to be but are not, than a religion they are not, so I am not suggesting that you should pretend.

Also, try talking it through with a counselor for advice or assistance- a professional might be able to show you some options. Or a website that specializes in helping people in your situation. I guarantee you that you are not alone- you're not the only one in your situation.

I've never searched for any sites that specialize in that sort of assistance, but if you head over to reddit there are some subreddits that I have been a subscriber to for a while, these ones seem to be decent places where I'm sure someone could point you in the right direction. At the very least they'll keep you up on the latest news regarding the LGBTQ community. They also pretty well modded most of the time, so they're pretty safe places (those subreddits specifically).

http://www.reddit.com/r/ainbow/
http://www.reddit.com/r/lgbt/
http://www.reddit.com/r/pansexual/
http://www.reddit.com/r/bisexual/

I included /r/bisexual because a lot of pan people identify as bi (since it's just easier to explain most of the time), and it's more active than /r/pansexual. I wish you the best of luck in getting through your situation. I wish I could offer you more help. I know there has to be better places to go for help, but I don't know where to start. So I'd start in one of those places I linked. But Lilith here on these boards might have some better suggestions. Smile

(05-10-2012 07:49 AM)earmuffs Wrote:  meh..

If you're not going to offer anything constructive, why even post? Huh
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05-10-2012, 09:35 AM
RE: what's the difference between supporting someones rights and....
(05-10-2012 08:28 AM)Dom Wrote:  Why are you waiting for HUD?

hud is my only hope. mainly because where I live I can't get to a job. no ride and it is what I got to work with but i would love to be self supporting. thanks you guys. btw my dads not mena he jsut has a fear of this sort of stuff.

1. Striding and swaggering rootlessness without end. The precious flow of life.
2. one should fear sweet a blood stained flower.
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05-10-2012, 09:49 AM
RE: what's the difference between supporting someones rights and....
(05-10-2012 09:35 AM)kunoxian drive Wrote:  
(05-10-2012 08:28 AM)Dom Wrote:  Why are you waiting for HUD?

hud is my only hope. mainly because where I live I can't get to a job. no ride and it is what I got to work with but i would love to be self supporting. thanks you guys. btw my dads not mena he jsut has a fear of this sort of stuff.

Then I'm with Kineo, sit tight but reach out and find alternatives. There has got to be better out there than waiting for HUD. You could get old and gray doing that.

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05-10-2012, 09:50 AM
RE: what's the difference between supporting someones rights and....
(05-10-2012 09:35 AM)kunoxian drive Wrote:  
(05-10-2012 08:28 AM)Dom Wrote:  Why are you waiting for HUD?

hud is my only hope. mainly because where I live I can't get to a job. no ride and it is what I got to work with but i would love to be self supporting. thanks you guys. btw my dads not mena he jsut has a fear of this sort of stuff.

That's good that he's not mean to you. But if he would kick you out, then that does seem mean. It also means that you have to live in fear and secret, does it not? I empathize to some degree- I don't know what would happen if I came out to my father. But I am out on my own. He already knows I'm an atheist. He'd probably assume I chose to be an atheist so I wouldn't have to feel guilty. I think he already assumes that to some degree. In any case, my dad isn't mean either. But his dedication to his religion doesn't make for an environment where I would be comfortable talking about anything regarding to sexuality, especially anything that is not heterosexuality.

He may not be physically abusing you, but it is still an impact on you to have to hide who you are from him. Still, since he's not hurting you, it might be best to wait it out and look for opportunities to get on your feet as best as you can. Getting out of the house before you can work and find housing will probably set you back even farther. Are you an adult living at home or a teenager?
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05-10-2012, 10:28 AM
RE: what's the difference between supporting someones rights and....
I'm an adult{age:28} thanx btw.

1. Striding and swaggering rootlessness without end. The precious flow of life.
2. one should fear sweet a blood stained flower.
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