why dies this tick me off so... "parenting"
Post Reply
 
Thread Rating:
  • 0 Votes - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
19-02-2016, 10:22 PM
why dies this tick me off so... "parenting"
I'll be the first to admit it.. I have never been a parent. I have never had a kid.... never wanted a kid and will never want one because I am highly irresponsible and thus don't need a tiny helpless being dependent on me..... but there's this one thing parents do to their kids that drives one to anger every time it comes up and I don't even now why. It's such an innocent passive thing too but every one of them do it.

If you can make this following statement your part of the problem.... "I am going to raise my child as... {add personality type here}... that statement just brings out the rage in me. again I have no clue why. I here this and think... so you just want a in you running around. what so your kid cant have likes and dislike sf there own. three days ago I about flipped in my own mind when the parent said. I am gong to raise my little girl as a "Tomboy".. I stayed quiet of coerce but silently I was frustrated. I was like your not going to let them be happy with who hey are and grow as a person.... your just making a min girl version of yourself or ideal girl.... please help me understand why I hate that phrase altogether. I still think i am right but just the rage that drives me insane when i hear it.

1. Striding and swaggering rootlessness without end. The precious flow of life.
2. one should fear sweet a blood stained flower.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
19-02-2016, 10:36 PM
RE: why dies this tick me off so... "parenting"
Perhaps you should worry yourself about things you can control?
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Thumpalumpacus's post
19-02-2016, 10:37 PM
RE: why dies this tick me off so... "parenting"
(19-02-2016 10:36 PM)Thumpalumpacus Wrote:  Perhaps you should worry yourself about things you can control?

I agree..it still ticks me off though.

1. Striding and swaggering rootlessness without end. The precious flow of life.
2. one should fear sweet a blood stained flower.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
19-02-2016, 11:35 PM
RE: why dies this tick me off so... "parenting"
Yeah, when my son was born I didn't want to cookie-cut him any way at all, just teach him how to think critically and reason for himself. And it's sad that so many kids are instead spoon-fed what to think.

But adding to your own stress over the shoddy parenting of others, well, you're gonna be one unhappy guy there -- nothing personal, you know what I'm saying.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Thumpalumpacus's post
19-02-2016, 11:39 PM
RE: why dies this tick me off so... "parenting"
I'm not planning on having kids. But I do agree that no one should be putting their dreams onto their children. I think it's good to nurture your kids with enough self confidence and support to grow in their own direction.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 2 users Like jennybee's post
19-02-2016, 11:46 PM
RE: why dies this tick me off so... "parenting"
thats ok... I have gotten my answer tough between now and me posting the original post... and epicaly it was a bad answer/wrong that made me realize the truth.. the truth is. my parents... the ones who love me and care for me have set up this rule. you see I used to paint my nails. till my dad got off the road and made a rule about not doing stuff like that at home... and that's an OK rule. if I didn't live in the middle of nowhere ad never had ay rides. this is led my to e effectively repressed in that way. to not expressed my demi-girlness. the thing is I kind of agree with his rule. thus when I see others that may feel the way I feel. I get angry and I need to be more self reflective not angry at possible things people may do....

P.s. I like the fact mty dad lets me do things else where. now only if I could get.. "elsewhere" then I would possible eel better.

1. Striding and swaggering rootlessness without end. The precious flow of life.
2. one should fear sweet a blood stained flower.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes kunoxian drive's post
20-02-2016, 01:16 AM
RE: why dies this tick me off so... "parenting"
I think most parents are quick to discover that their child is an individual.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 5 users Like Nishi Karano Kaze's post
20-02-2016, 05:43 AM
RE: why dies this tick me off so... "parenting"
There are a LOT of people who have kids so they can live forever. It's a thing.

When I obviously wasn't having kids when my peers did, people always asked why not. I usually asked back: "Why should I?" The answer most given was: "So you can live on in your children".

I can see how that leads to trying to make little copies of oneself...and saw a lot in my peers how that backfired as the kids grew, and bred resentment. On both sides.

[Image: dobie.png]Science is the process we've designed to be responsible for generating our best guess as to what the fuck is going on. Girly Man
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
20-02-2016, 07:30 PM
RE: why dies this tick me off so... "parenting"
I think most people have kids because sex is fun and we are biologically programmed to procreate. Of course there are other reasons too. Maybe it's so that you live on through your kids, maybe you just love children, or maybe live in a time and place when it's economical to have as many kids as possible to work the farm. There are religious reasons which allow it, and religious reasons to promote it as well.

Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
20-02-2016, 07:52 PM
RE: why dies this tick me off so... "parenting"
(19-02-2016 11:46 PM)kunoxian drive Wrote:  thats ok... I have gotten my answer tough between now and me posting the original post... and epicaly it was a bad answer/wrong that made me realize the truth.. the truth is. my parents... the ones who love me and care for me have set up this rule. you see I used to paint my nails. till my dad got off the road and made a rule about not doing stuff like that at home... and that's an OK rule. if I didn't live in the middle of nowhere ad never had ay rides. this is led my to e effectively repressed in that way. to not expressed my demi-girlness. the thing is I kind of agree with his rule. thus when I see others that may feel the way I feel. I get angry and I need to be more self reflective not angry at possible things people may do....

P.s. I like the fact mty dad lets me do things else where. now only if I could get.. "elsewhere" then I would possible eel better.

Okay, now I understand what you are saying/asking.

I do think that some people have children and they create a little life script in their minds. A little girl brings thoughts of dresses, hairbows, maybe cheerleading, prom dresses, a wedding, and grandchildren (among other things). A little boy paints a script of a rough and tumble child, dad can't wait to get a football in his hand, he will follow dad into whatever career, or go off to college, find a nice young lady to be his wife, grandchildren.

When the child doesn't follow the script, it can be hard for some parents to deviate from what they had envisioned. Some try to squeeze the child into the role they had invented for them.

I am hoping that this is changing. That the gender expectations become less defined and parents becoming more able to love unconditionally.

That said...if your dad is only asking that don't wear nail polish and you are dependent upon your parents...then compromise may be the best thing for now. Until you can get 'elsewhere'. Smile

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Anjele's post
Post Reply
Forum Jump: